Crime and Adventure episode 8
© Mazi Omenuko
I guessed I was in for a long night!
Might as well start confessing my crimes
to her. She didn’t look like the forgiving
type; something I had learnt about easy
going peeps: they tend to not-forgive.
Had she seen the cash earlier? Was she
trying to taunt me? Was she trying to
rub it on my face, to have the last
laugh? A lot of questions popped up
with no answers. I was still standing in
front of the cabinet stark Unclad, staring
at the doors like there was a python
waiting to strike if I dared open it.
How I wish there was a python there! I
thought to myself. At least the
emergence of a python will have us
scamp from the bathroom and save the
day for me.
“Check the carton inside the cabinet!”
She called out again from behind.
Now it was obvious I was done for. I
might as well pretend to have seen a
python and run-off the room. That would
be an epic-fail to my quest for
adventure! I had to think or act fast.
I opened the cabinet slowly; peeped
inside and saw the carton inside. I knew
what was inside; it was loads of 500
naira bills I had stashed out, not
toiletries and condoms.
I decided to let it play out and see where
I slowly dragged the carton to the
opened cabinet door so she can see it
from where she was seated at the tub. I
opened it and looked inside knowinging
fully well she couldn’t see the insides
from where she was.
“There’s no condom here!” I pronounced,
closed it and left it still at the opened
door of the cabinet.
“Really?” She asked. I didn’t turn to look
at her face; I didn’t trust the look on my
own face and I may end up betraying
myself from the look on my face.
“No!” I said.
Then I went on to open other cabinets
inside the bathroom until I found the
new set that was brought that morning. I
opened it and found the condom inside.
“Here it is!” I announced, waving a
bundle of condoms at her. She didn’t
look satisfied. She still had that
mischievous smile on her face. I
approached her at the tub and noticed
she still stole an occasional glance at
the carton of cash behind me.
My dckk was flaccid when I joined her at
the tub. A disturbed mind is a recipe to
failure at s£x. I had to work extra hard
to get it up and get turned on. At a
point, it was as if I wasn’t going to be
able to keep it up but I kept working on
my game until I had it up. When I was
ready, I wore the condom and we
continued from where we stopped; only
that this time, it wasn’t as hot as it was
supposed to be.
When we were done, I stayed back and
told her I needed to shower before
joining her at the bed. She looked at me
like she had something to say but went
inside without saying a word.
I turned on the shower and reminisced
inside the tub as warm water sprinkled
on my body. I thought about the events
of the past hour.
I still didn’t understand fully what had
transpired but my mind gave me two
versions of what I felt happened: she
must have seen the carton sometime
and feel it was the usual hotel stuffs
inside it. Or had she opened it and saw
cash inside? Was she trying to know
where the cash came from by indirectly
showing it to me? If that was the case,
then it means I had indirectly confirmed
to her that I know about the cash. I
silently prayed that version 1 was what
had happened and she wasn’t aware of
what was inside the carton. But my
instincts told me otherwise.
There was little or nothing I could do at
the moment. I walked out of the tub and
moved towards the cabinet with the
cash. The cabinet on the wall had four
cardboards, one of the cardboards had a
transparent glass on it. The other
opposite wall had a cabinet with just 2
cardboards. It was inside one of the
cardboards that I had seen the other
carton with the condom. The mirror on
the wall of the bathroom had yet another
cardboard beneath it.
I brought out the carton with the cash,
opened it and took a look at the cash. It
was still intact. Loose bundles of 500
notes occupying almost half of the
I moved the carton with cash into the
cardboard under the mirror. I removed
all the condoms in the other carton and
placed the carton in the cabinet where
the cash-carton was. Relieved at my
temporary solution, I walked out of the
She was fast asleep when I entered the
room. It was still few hours to midnight.
I lay on the bed, staring at the walls. I
needed a solution to move the money
and each time I thought about it, the
name ‘Eve’ pops up. The lady was still
asleep and there was no need to wake
her up. Again, I reached for the handbag,
took the cards and the phone lying on
the bed and went out of the room.
The clock hanging at the reception read
10:55pm. The reception hall was still
filled with people; drinking, eating and
talking. I looked around in search for
Eve. How was I going to find her at this
big hotel! I needed to ask questions so I
went to the young man manning one of
the mini-bars at the reception.
“How’s the night going?” I asked with a
“Fine sire! What will you be drinking sir?”
He asked elegantly with a smile on his
“Hmmm…” I stared confused at the
richly stocked bar.
“Recommend one for me.” I said.
He looked around, then smiled as her
reached for one of the spirits at the bar
and poured a class for me.
He stayed back and watched my face as
I swallowed a mouthful.
It was bad! So bad I found it hard to
swallow. Spirits wasn’t my brand; hated
the d–n thing like a february curse but
I managed to smile back at him.
“Good!” I proclaimed! “Real good.”
“I knew you would love it.” He teased.
I managed to take another gulp. I
wanted him to feel I was his kind, a jolly
good fellow. I needed to ask him a favor.
“Where can I see Eve?” I asked.
The expression on his face changed like
he was shocked.
“You know her?” He asked.
“Yes, she’s been cleaning my room for
some days now.” I said. When the
expression didn’t change, I had to make
him relax a bit.
“She’s very diligent in her work and I like
her person. Want to say goodbye and
tell her thank you before leaving
tomorrow.” I added.
He relaxed his looks and smiled at me.
Maybe he had thought I wanted to make
an official complaints or something.
“She works the east blocks and I’m sure
she’s on duty because I’ve seen her
earlier.” He said.
“East blocks?” I asked.
“Yes, the rooms that way.” He said,
pointing towards a part of the hotel.
“If she’s on duty, she will be at the staff
common room down there.” He said.
“I can reach her on the intercom if you
want.” He volunteered.
“No need for that, I will find my way to
her.” I replied.
That was a lot of useful information. I
thanked him, payed for the drink, tipped
him some money and walked out.
“Your drink!” He called at me as I was
making a move towards the east-side.
“I hate spirits!” I said and watched the
look on his face change to its default
To be continued
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