Finding me episode 1

Finding Me
episode 1
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I have always been the quiet type.
The type who talked less and observed more. I was always being bullied at a point in junior secondary school because of my calmness.
I used to be a happy child before life hit me. At a point in my life I begged for death.
As a child I was plain stupid to have begged for it.
I remember when I was little, my mum would tell me “Eriel don’t sit on any man’s lap. All men are the same”
As a child I was naive. Little did I know what she meant.
As I grew older it came to my realisation that my mother had been using herself for example.
All men are the same and no matter how good they were , they would still look out.
She had been talking about my father.
He had been a good man, but that hadn’t stopped him from looking outside or even making advances on the maids.
My mother loved him still even with everything he did.
Even after he had passed away.
Well this is not her story, so I wouldn’t go into details.
My name is Eriel and this is the story of how I became a woman.
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Episode 1
I remember the first s€× education I had.
It was scary. My mum shakened up my bones in just one sentence.
“If you get pregnant, you would go and live with father’s family”
I sure as heck wasn’t planning to. So I nodded frantically and swore that I was never going to have s€×.
Never.
Until marriage though.
I remember the first time I saw my period and I got all manner of lectures.
“If a man touches you, Pam! You would get pregnant” a cousin told me.
“When a man stops you, don’t wait to listen to what he has to say, run!!” Another told me.
I was really scared. And I made sure to abide by this rules.
When I got to jss2 I read my first novel. It was a thriller, mixed with a little bit of rom-nce.
I still remember the title.
I loved the story, especially the rom-nce part. I learnt things that I had no knowledge of.
My second novel was an harlequin novel, given to me by mum’s friend when I was in Jsss2 (my mum had no idea what the content held, because if she had, she wouldn’t have let me read it).
The novel was even more explicit than the first novel. I discovered that when I read some scenes I had butterflies in my stomach and I felt a little funny down there.
I got addicted to this novels as I grew older. Since I couldn’t have s€×. I read alot.
I remember reading the three parts of fifty shades of grey even long before the movie came out.
That was my first Bdsm story. And as much as I loved it and it got me all w-t, I still couldn’t imagine being Anastasia. I guess Bdsm wasn’t my thing after all.
.
I kept on reading books since I was not allowed to have s€×.
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I remember my first real experience with the opposite s€×.
It was with my mum’s friend nephew who always came to visit.
I was about twelve years old at that time and I barely had any br-ast.
God knows I still wonder what he saw in me.
Uncle Seun was really nice to me.
He was always nice to me.
He was extremely nice to me.
And little did I know why. Well, I later got to realise why.
It was a sunny afternoon (I can’t remember the day) I was washing the dishes and that was when he came unto me. Using his body to press me to the sink and grabbing my barely grown br-ast.
It was painful. I think the ladies in the house would understand what I mean.
I used all the little strength in me to push him away. I threatened to report to my mum and he started pleading.
Telling me that he didn’t know what got into him.
I didn’t report to my mum but my hate for him grew every day .
I began to wonder why the feeling I got wasn’t the same feelings I get when reading my stories.
I also remember my second experience. Well, I wouldn’t call it an experience because we weren’t physical.
I had just turned sixteen and I went out with my cousin in festac. We went to her kotonu boyfriend’s house. I can’t really remember what business he was into but he was making it big time.
So we went to her boyfriend’s house and we were about leaving when her boyfriend’s boss drove in.
This man was fine with curly hair and all.
I swear fine was even an understatement. He was Lebanese I think.
Immediately he drove in, our eyes met and in my mind, it was teenage love. Lol. How foolish and naive I was!
He told us he wanted to take us out, and my cousin agreed, inviting two of my other cousins to tag along.
So we went out and the Lebanese guy had eyes only for one girl.
Me.
I wondered what he saw when he looked at me.
If it was my flat round standing br-asts or my barely there bum bum. Lol.
I was dressed like one who was going to church and my cousins were dressed way hotter.
I still can’t phantom why he picked me.
His gaze never left my face. And even if I was a bit naive I knew what the look on his face was but I pushed it to the back of my mind.
Well, he finally told me to come closer and he asked how old I was.
I told him the truth, that I had just turned sixteen.
He stared at me in open mouthed shock before crashing my teenage fantasy with his nasty words.
“So that means no man has ever fvcked you before”
After he said this words, I hated him. I didn’t care about how fine he was or how much he was worth.
My dislike for him grew immediately. No one had ever spoken so rudely and vulgar to me before.
I didn’t answer him. I just threw my face away .
Tbc