(A true life story)
I have learnt my lessons in a hard way, but I have decided that this will not weigh me down. It is time to move ahead. And the first thing is to leave this hostel, I can’t be seeing Joe and Anna and Bright almost everyday, and so with this i set to look for another hostel, days later I packed out of that compound.
I am beginning to pick up the pieces of my life, school was going smooth, I am now in 200level, I no longer share classes with Joe or Anna and this was a huge relief for me. We just resumed our first semester of the second year. Throughout my stay at home during the holidays, I didn’t think of Joe or Bright, but as soon as I got back to school, even though we ain’t in same hostel no more, the memories came back, this time I didn’t feel bad instead I told myself it was making me a stronger woman. I knew I have moved on.
On this faithful day, I was on my way from class, suddenly I started feeling pains in my stomach, at first I was beating it, but at a point the pains became unbearable, I had to stop and rest. And so I sat by the road side crying, I tried to call Lucy but her number was switched off. Since I moved out of the house where we used to stay I hardly see her, except in class.when I couldn’t reach her, I sat down and cried, I was still crying when this guy walked up to me. Are you okay? He asked? I looked at him and told him I was fine. No you are not he replied, you are crying! I said am fine I told him. But this guy was stubborn and wouldn’t bulge. I decided to leave him there. I tried to stand, but I couldn’t, I was falling, he quickly caught me , and then he told me to lean on him, I had no choice but to do so. Then he asked me for my address. I didn’t hesitate to give him, and that was how Sammy came into my life.
Sammy took me to my house, he took care of me that day, he even went to get me some drugs. He helped me warm my food before he left. He collected my number and made sure he called me when he got home to know how I was feeling. I told him I was better. It was then I asked him where his hostel was, then he laughed and said he does not school in
DELSU , that he only came to see a friend. I was a bit relieved because I have promised myself that I was never talking with any DELSU guys in my life again. I ended the call and I slept off.
Three days later, Sammy left DELSU, we have become so close in this few days. He calls me every morning and every night. And so I was not surprised when i Started missing him after
You can’t teach the heart who and when to love can you? I was in love again. I will be careful this time I told myself. I didn’t want to tell Lucy about it and so I kept it to myself. It wasn’t for long before Sammy and I started dating.. ….when he come to town, I know he came to see me. It was awesome , it was beautiful. But Sammy was not as rich as Joe. I was the one spending, I bought clothes for him, when we go out I pay for whatever stuff we buy, I even have to give him tfare whenever he comes visiting me and honestly I didn’t care. I was happy that he was with me, that was all that mattered to me.
The only thing sammy had to offer me was s£x. But this time I took Lucy’s advice, I always used condoms because I didn’t want what happened before to repeat itself. Something kept telling me that Sammy was a player and will break my heart again like joe, but I was adamant, I kept telling myself that before he will dump me I will dump him. I kept telling myself that I did not love him enough and that he can go if he wants and I won’t feel hurt like I did with Joe but I was wrong. I was already in love with Sammy without my knowing!
It’s like loosing my virginity made me believe that there was nothing more to protect. I guess Joe leaving me had more effect in me than I imagined. Now Sammy was my boyfriend, I gave him s£x anytime he wants it, I dare not say no. Maybe, just maybe I didn’t f–k Joe well and that was why he chose Anna, I was not going to make that mistake with Sammy. I was finally letting go of Joe permanently, now all I see is Sammy, I breathe Sammy, I eat Sammy, I see Sammy, Sammy was all and all.
Loving someone is not wrong, but loving foolishly is a disease, I didn’t know this until the matter days of my life, for Sammy soon got to find out that I loved him more than he loved me, and so the misbehaving began. He would be with me and call other girls and tell them how much he misses them. When he ends the call, he would tell me am still his number one. And I would foolishly relax and accept him like that assurance was all I needed.
Sammy would ask me for transport to visit a girl to have a one night stand like he normally calls it and I would give him the tfare to go, and I would be him to please return back to me. And he would tell me not to worry that he will definitely come back. But why won’t he? When I was his source of income. I was his maga.
Somehow I knew this, but I was too scared to let him go and I was too embarrassed to tell Lucy because I already know what her advice will be. this was a cross I have to bear alone. It got to the point that Sammy would bring his girls to my hostel and I would stroll out for him to lash them. Yes lash, that was what he called having s£x! When I know or suspect that he was through I would go back to him and he will tell me am his one and only, and that he was just using the other girls. I dare not talk so he won’t threaten to leave me.
Honestly, I do not know the reason I had this fear, maybe because people have always told me am not very pretty, so I was scared that if he leaves no other guy will ask me out. Maybe this was the reason I took and endured all this. Call me a fool, yes! I agree, I won’t argue with you, you are not in my shoes so you won’t understand what I was going through.
Sammy kept up with his cheating acts for 1year and 4months. I endured his excess cheating, I tolerated his mistakes. If I dare complain he would tell me it was over and then I will cry and beg him over and over again. It was a living hell
On this faithful day, my cousin Sandra came to visit me in school, I was so excited. I was in the kitchen trying to make something for her when Sammy came in,”hey baby I smiled and came out to give him a tight hug and a kiss on the lips”. He turned and looked at my cousin with his flirting looks. “Who is this he asked?” Well this is my cousin, she came to see me all the way from Benin. Her name is Sandra . “nice to meet you Sandra, he said stretching his hands to her for a handshake. I wasn’t comfortable because I know my Sammy. But somehow I trusted my cousin. After all, I just introduced him as my boyfriend.
They didn’t talk much , Sammy was pressing his phones all through while I chatted with Sandra. Not long, Sammy told me he was going out to see someone. After he left Sandra asked me, Steph this tour guy looks like a big player o, do u trust him? Which guy is not a player I asked her? Every guy is a born cheat I concluded. She laughed and told me it’s true. An hour later she told me she was leaving and I saw her off to the gate and came back to lie down and rest.
Hours later Sammy came back home, he asked after Sandra and I told him she had left, we ate and he resumed with the pressing of his phone. I was in the house with my boyfriend yet I felt lonely . the next morning he traveled back.
That was the last time I heard from my boyfriend. He stopped calling me, he won’t even text, If I call he hardly picks, if he picks he will tell me he is busy and can’t talk. This was not easy for me. Why was he acting like this, I have given him all the freedom he needed so why is he about leaving me now. I asked myself these questions but found no answer. Eventually he sent me a text saying I shouldn’t call him anymore that it was over between us. It was not as I’d I was surprised, I expected it, but that didn’t make it easy on me, I still felt bad. I still cried. I still felt very hurt.
I was not letting go easily, I traveled home to see Sammy, I need to know why he did what he just did. When I got there he was not home. I sat down and waited for almost two hours outside his house. Eventually he came, he was not alone, he was with his new girlfriend. SANDRA!
I looked at both of them, I smiled , even though in my heart I felt sharp pains, I smiled again, Sandra’s face was faced ground, Sammy could not look at me , he was looking from left to right. I just took my purse and without saying anything I walked away.
But what was I expecting? I knew from the start that he was a chronic player yet I lingered on. Am a fool right? I haven’t learnt my lesson right? Cause me all you want, I deserve it but don’t forget you dont tell the heart whom and whom not to love .
To be continued!