Memoirs of A Lagos PLAYBOY Episode 33

Memoirs of A Lagos PLAYBOY………. Episode 33
 
As I sat in my office, my heart raced faster than normal. It had been that way since that night. I was unable to concentrate at work and pretty much everything else. I lived in fear but I felt relieved. Indeed, the first step is always the longest stride. My injuries were healing nicely but I had to make up a lie about my injuries even though I told myself I’d never lie again. So much for promises made to myself.
 
Even though the outcome was what I expected, I still couldn’t believe everything that happened. From my close shave with death at the hands of those hoodlums to the epiphany I had and the result afterwards.
 
Tunde was furious when I refused to take any of his calls after that night. I was supposed to give him feedback but what was I going to tell him? He sent several consolation messages when he realised that the worst might have happened. He warned me not to ever consider suicide, else he would chase me to the fiery depths of Hades and kill me himself. Even Amaka called but I wouldn’t take any of their calls. Tuoyo and Ifeanyi assumed the worst and checked up on my house everyday after work but never met me.
 
I needed some time away from the world to think so I lodged in a hotel. I used a cab everyday to work and made sure none of my friends could reach me while I was there. Malik and Nike gave me space, thinking I was grieving for my non-existent friend who’s funeral I attended.
 
Was I really ready to be a different person from who I was? Didn’t Christy deserve better than me? She hadn’t called me since that day. It was her idea that we shouldn’t speak till something happened. What “something” was, I couldn’t fathom and she wouldn’t tell.
…………………………………
 
Retro:
 
“Christy, I’m a jerk. Probably the biggest jerk you’ve ever met.” She didn’t utter a word. Neither was there a in change in her facial expression which I watched intently for any positive sign. She continued to clean my face gently with warm water laced with disinfectant.
 
“I screwed up big time. I betrayed you deeply and I haven’t had the nerve to show my face…until now.” I continued. There was still no change in her facial expression. It was totally blank.
 
“Christy…” I said gently. I took the hand that held the warm w-t cloth to stop her from what she was doing. She finally looked at me with a tired expression on her face.
 
“I almost died today. ” I said with emphasis. “All I could think of was the fact that the one person I love in this world is probably still angry with me for the dumb, dumb mistake I made.”
 
I paused to recollect myself.
 
“I guess when my life flashed before my eyes, all I could see was the sadness in your eyes the day you left me. I had to live to make it right…if you’ll ever let me.” There was still no change in her demeanor. My words seemed useless. I had to let my heart speak.
 
“Chris…” I went on one knee, still holding her hand and taking the other in mine. “I’ve been totally miserable without you. You are the string that held my life together. I tried to forget you…I had other girls but none could fill the gaping h0le you left. No one could occupy the special place you have in my heart.”
 
Her eyes became misty and she looked away.
 
“Chris, I’m here now…much wiser and ready to be the man you want.” I said candidly. I touched her face and felt her shiver. I turned her face to meet mine and that was when I saw her tears.
 
“Baby, I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. All I ask is for one last chance. I swear on my life that I’ll make it right…I’ll never stray again…I’ll never make you cry ever again.” I said, very near to tears myself. I hated to see her hurt.
 
She stood up and left me on my knees and walked around the luxuriously furnished sitting room, deep in thought and suddenly she stopped and turned to me.
 
“Mickey, please stand up.” Her voice was soft and steady.
 
“I won’t until you forgive me.” I said earnestly. She smiled and shook her head.
 
“Well, you can stand up then.” She said.
 
“Do you forgive me?” I asked.
 
“Are you trying to bully me into forgiving you?” She asked with a little sneer.
 
“I can’t do that. I’m just…I just hope there’s still a little something in your heart that will make you forgive me…a little?”. I said hopefully. She came towards me and pulled me up to my feet.
 
“I forgave you a long time ago. I can’t stay angry at you for so long.” She said. When I made to hold her, she pushed me back.
 
“I’m not done yet.” Here goes, I thought.
 
“I find it rather distasteful that you could go behind my back and…and…God! Why did it have to be Kemi?!” She asked, her body shaking with emotion. I looked down, feeling deeply ashamed for the first time.
 
“I hated you for so long but I couldn’t keep up with it. It was eating me up in,side so I decided to let it go. You hurt me so much…you made a fool out of me. When I think of the lies you told me at Tunde’s wedding…God! I was such a fool!! I knew you were lying but I didn’t want to believe it. How could you look me in the eye and lie and still sleep soundly at night with me by your side?” She shook as she spoke but it wasn’t rage, it was something else.
 
“I don’t know if I can ever trust you again…after that.” She said tears falling from her eyes.
 
“Baby…” I started but she cut me short.
 
“Don’t “baby” me! What you did was so, so wrong. I don’t deserve it. No one has ever hurt me the way you have. Yet, I just…just know that there’s something…I don’t know.” She said exasperated for the lack of words to capture how she felt, I guessed. She cleaned her eyes with the back of her hand.
 
There was an awkward silence. I felt like a child who was being scolded for taking a dip into the cookie jar. Yet, her reprimand though stern, wasn’t harsh. I didn’t know what to do.
 
“Chris, I know it may be hærd to trust me again but all I ask is one last chance to prove myself…”
 
“My heart can’t take another shocker. Its too fragile…” She said, shaking her head.
 
“I’ll cushion my hands…I’ll do anything.” I said desperately.
 
“Your lip is still bleeding.” She said, dipping the cloth into the little bowl of water on the floor and dabbing my mouth. The water was lukewarm now but I still felt a little sting from the disinfectant. I held her hands.
 
“Just one last chance.” I pleaded. “I’m not perfect but I’ve put away my childish ways and I swear I’ll …”
 
“Shhh…your l-ips are bleeding again.” She said, trying to dab my l-ips again. I took her hand with the w-t cloth and put it on my heart.
 
“My heart bleeds more. I don’t want to live without you. I need you Chris. I love you.” I said.
 
She sighed painfully and looked down. I reached for my pocket and went on one knee.
 
“Chris, this is probably not the best time to do this but if I die tomorrow, I’ll burn in a hell of my own making for realising too late what you’re worth. The day I first met you, I admit that you were just another girl but now, I know you’re THE girl.” As the suede box came out of my pocket, her hands flew to her mouth as she gasped.
 
“I guess what all my frolicking has done for me is show me that no one compares to you. I’m done with my sampling…I’m done with playing around. If you will marry me, I promise to treat you like the queen you are.” I retrieved the diamond ring and put it on her finger and k-ssed it with fervent prayers.
 
“Will you marry me Chris?” I said, looking up at her.
 
Her tears flowed freely and before long, she broke into heavy sobs.
 
“Why are you doing this now?” She cried. “This cruel. This is wicked.”
 
“I…I…I…don’t understand.” I stammered bemused.
 
“I can’t do this now. I can’t deal with this now. Its late. I have to get to bed. You have to go.” She said sobbing.
 
I felt myself deflate instantly. As I stood, she hurried me out of the house, crying profusely. I kept muttering “I’m sorry, I’m sorry”, totally lost. Before I knew it, I was out in the dark and silent night. I walked unsteadily to my car, my mind totally blank. I entered the car and sat there watching as the darkness of the night faded gradually. I was too depressed to do anything but sit and mope.
 
An hour or more must have passed before a text message alert on my phone woke me up from my dazed stupor. It was from Christy. A short but concise message.
 
“My answer is YES but I think  we shouldn’t communicate for a while. I’m waiting for something. Please go home now.”
@sayMalcolm