MEMOIRS OF AN UGLY GIRL
– *Diary entry –41*
‘To get over the past, you first have to accept that the past is over. No matter how many times you revisit it, analyze it, regret it or sweat it… it’s over.’ Many Hale
It’s been months since he broke up with me, three months to be precise.
I have watched the weeks drift by one after another and in those weeks the dull ache in my heart has lessened, I have stopped ruminating endlessly about the past, what’s done is done.
I can still remember just how hard it was at some point for me to live without him, the pain of his heart break had consumed me for weeks, I wasn’t eating, I wasn’t sleeping properly and I was slowly disconnecting from school and life, it was really hard for me.
But when I started talking to Mrs. Mariano the turmoil in my heard, I realized I had been carrying some heavy emotional baggage so I slowly began to open up to her. She didn’t judge me nor did she question me she was there all the time ready to listen.
And then things started to get better slowly, one day at a time finally I began to see bits and bits of light at the end of my tunnel.
Another thing that helped me heal faster is writing about my experience, not just about my relationship with Elijah but my whole life- everything starting from when Viola left.
I have found a deeply satisfying purpose in writing and someday I might just write a book.
Anyway so schools have closed and I am working part time as an Administrative Assistant at Angie’s father’s firm, the good news is that he has promised to hire me full time after I graduate, provided that i prove myself to be competent. This is something big for me, I am putting in my all I don’t want to mess things up, if they hire me immediately I graduate then I won’t have to worry about where to stay, Koko, the girls and I can move out of that house.
I have my fingers crossed and I am actually confident that things will work for my good this time around. I know my God will not put me to shame for calling out to him.
So, I wake up at 6 to the sound of my alarm clock and walk straight into my bathroom. After a quick shower, I slip into my clothes, I apply some make up and style up my hair.
Finally I slip my feet into a pair of pink sandals which compliment my white flared dress.
I pull out my handbag and pack everything I will need for work for that day then I head out to the kitchen.
‘Morning Baby,’ Koko kisses my forehead.
‘Morning Koko,’ I smile brightly at her
‘Somebody is happy.’
‘It’s the day that the lord has made I am glad and I will rejoice in it.’
I sit at the table and Koko hands me a cup of hot tea, she also gives me some scones and I immediately start eating.
By the time I finish eating Angie is already here to pick me up, surprisingly she is dressed formally today Angie likes jeans and skimpy clothes.
‘Thanks for the breakfast Koko,’ I say as I rise to my feet.
‘Are you satisfied?’
‘I will see you later.’
‘May God go ahead of you and may he bless you abundantly and exceedingly above all that you may ask for.’
‘Amen,’ we answer in unison.
We wave at her as we hurriedly walk out of the door.
‘I love how you look today,’ I complement Angie as she starts the car.
‘What happened to the jeans?’
She smiles, ‘I am trying to emulate you my father is impressed at how dedicated you are. He asked me to learn a thing or two from you and that’s what I am going to do.’
‘Wow!’ I exclaim
‘My father has never approved of any of my friends Zendaya, it’s different with you, he says you are good for me and I agree with him.’
‘So from today henceforth I am joining you at work.’
‘Yes,’ a huge grin spreads across my face, I am excited for her, the past week I have been working she has only be coming for work with me just to pass time.
At 7: 30, she pulls into the parking lot and we step out.
We walk into the building while laughing at a joke she just passed about Elijah.
At the reception, we sign into the attendance sheet- our time in.
Then we walk to our cubicles at the far end of the room which are next to each other.
‘Hey there! We greet some our colleagues, being the daughter of the owner, most people here treat Angie with so much respect as if she is the actual boss.
As soon as I settle down, I turn on my computer then I make a few phone calls just to remind everyone about the meeting at 10.
I am analyzing some financial reports which were given to me on Friday, times runs by so fast and before I know it, it’s almost 10.
I hurriedly walk to the conference room where the meeting will be taking place and prepare the laptop and projector, I make sure we have enough chairs for everyone attending then I rush out and print out and photocopy the agenda of the meeting.
Its 10 hours people make their way into the conference room I distribute the papers to everyone. The meeting starts as I take notes of the minutes for the meeting.
A few proposals are made about the incoming project, people debate over them eventually we settle for one and the meeting is adjourned.
They all walk out while I turn of the laptop and projector.
I head back to my desk and start working on the report for my boss, while I respond to emails. When I finalize the report, I email it to him and he is quiet impressed.
After lunch my boss sends me to attend a meeting on behalf of him, it’s a last minute decision and I hardly have time to prepare myself but either way the driver drives me there.
I step out of the car and draw in a sharp breathe before I head towards the entrance of the hotel where the meeting is taking place. When I walk in I instantly spot Mr. Ben the man I am supposed having a meeting with so I head over to his table.
At this point my head is fuzzy and I kinda feel nauseated, my palms are also sweaty, what if I make a mistake, like this is the first meeting I am attending on behalf of my boss.
‘Mr. Ben?’ I ask just trying to be sure he is the one because I have only seen him once.
‘Miss Mathjis’, he stands up
‘Good afternoon thanks.’ he extends a hand towards mine and I shake it.
‘Hope I didn’t keep you waiting.’
‘No, I just go here please sit down.’
I pull a chair behind and quickly slid in soon enough a waiter walks over to us and asks us to order, I am hesitant at first but he convinces me to make an order, the bill is on him.
Mr. Ben owns his own company and he wants us to partner in a project that will help empower young girls in rural areas but he will only pitch in if our idea is good and that’s where I come in.
‘I am glad your boss sends you, I like to hear fresh ideas from young ladies like you,’ he smiles
The way he says young ladies as if he is too old, Mr. Ben is actually young, could be in his early thirties and he is hot not that I am searching or something I am just appreciating the hand work of our good lord.
‘Thank you sir.’
‘Let’s drop the sir thing- I am not that old just call me Melvin.’
‘So let hear what you have for me,’ he smiles
I remove the notebook where I had scribbled a few things when I was in the car then I start explaining how we plan to achieve the goals of the project.
As I talk I can feel his eyes on me, he has hardly touched his food.
‘Wow!’ he exclaims when I am done explaining
‘This is brilliant I love it, I hope you will be the person in charge of this project, you have great ideas.’
‘Eat up,’ he encourages
We eat in silence, afterwards he settles the bill and we are good to go.
‘I honestly love the idea and what I need now is financial sheet for the costs and how they will be broken down between the two firms.’
‘I will be out of town for a week but when I am back, I will schedule another meeting so we can look into those.’
‘Do you have transport?’
‘I need to call the driver to pick me up.’
‘Don’t worry I will drive you back to the office.’
‘You don’t have to.’
He holds my hand and we walk towards the car park, this man is so free with me as if we know each other before this.
As we walk to the car, I am laughing hard at a joke he passed like he is so hilarious.
‘You are gonna choke,’ he rubs my back
‘I can’t help it,’ I say in between laughs
He laughs too.
‘Zendaya!’ Someone calls my name and before I know it I already know who it is.
‘So it’s truly you,’ he says
Melvin quickly brings his hand to my face and wipes away the tears that had fallen due to me laughing.
‘What are you doing here?’
‘Business meeting,’ I respond
Melvin clears his throat
‘Pardon my manners, this is Mr. Nuez he is my lecturer,’ I tell Melvin then I turn to Elijah, ‘this is Melvin a business partner and an acquaintance.’
‘Nice to meet you,’ Melvin says to Elijah, ‘you do am amazing Job lecturing her, she is one brainy woman.’
‘Ya,’ he fakes a smile
There is an awkward silence in the air
‘Anyway we had better be going sir,’ I tell Elijah breaking the silence.
‘Okay great, it was nice seeing you.’
‘Pleasure is mine.’
As Melvin and I turn and walk to his car, I can feel Elijah’s eyes on me but that doesn’t even bother me.
He opens the car door for me and I slid into my seat before he goes to the other side and climbs into the driver’s seat then he starts the car.