Memoirs of an ugly girl batch 30

Memoirs of an ugly girl
FRIDAY*
*26th January* ,
– *Diary Entry 48&49-*
Dear Diary,
‘Zen!’
We lock eyes and my heart beats wildly in my chest I can’t believe he is here.
‘Hey,’ I finally manage to say
‘You look good.’
I smile,’ Thanks.’
Okay off record, Elijah looks yummy, I can’t stop staring at his toned body he looks different in a good way. I am dying to be in his arms right now okay my emotions are just running wild right now.
‘Congratulations,’ he says, ‘I am supper proud of you I always believed you could make it.’
A bright smile spreads across my l-ips, hearing these words from him make me happy.
Mel clears his throat, lord I even forgot about him.
‘My Bad, Babe you remember Mr. Nuez.’
‘Yes Babe,’ he says placing an emphasis on the word ‘Babe.’
‘Good to see you!’ he says
‘Good to see you too,’ Elijah says.
There is an awkward silence for a brief second till Angie rushes towards us and scre-ms while hugging me.
‘What?’
‘Guess.’
‘Just tell me.’
She flashes some car keys in my face.
‘You lie?’
‘White Jaguar XJ.’
‘OMG.’
‘I know right, I am excited.’
‘Congratulations.’
‘Thanks. Dad got you something too, it’s in the car.’
‘Will check it out.’
‘Elijah!’
‘Hey Angie.’
‘Good to see you.’
‘Good to see you too.’
‘Babe we need to get going, let me just talk to bae,’ Angie says
‘Okay.’
‘So, can I just talk to you for a minute? Elijah asks
‘Babe do you mind,’ I ask Mel.
‘No,’ he responds but deep now I know he is fuming with anger.
Elijah and I walk over to where his car is.
‘I am sorry I popped in without letting you.’
‘It’s okay.’
‘How are you?’
‘I am good, how are you?’
‘I am fine.’
‘How’s life in S.A?’
He shrugs ‘So- so.’
‘Great.’
‘I miss you.’
Silence
‘I know you moved on Zen, I just can’t help it. I haven’t been able to get you off my mind.’
‘How is Clarence?’ I ask trying to change the subject.
‘I messed up pretty bad Zen, if you could turn back the hands of time I swear I would.’
‘It’s no use talking about the past.’
‘I know.’
‘Just let it go.’
‘Fine.’
‘I am going back on Sunday but I would like to spend even just an hour with you…,’
‘Elijah.’
‘For old time’s sake.’
‘I don’t know.’
‘Please.’
‘I will see what I can do.’
‘And I got you something but I will give it to you on Sunday.’
‘Okay.’
‘How is Koko?’
‘She is great, she just left.’
‘Okay.’
He holds my hand, his touch takes me back to the past and butterflies fill my tummy. We stare at each other for a brief second, Lord why did he have to mess us up, we were perfect together.
‘I have to go,’ I say after a while, I don’t want Mel to come looking for me.
‘Take care.’
‘You too.’
He lets go of my hand and I turn to walk away but he grabs my arm again and I turn to face him. I am caught off guard as he pulls me forward into a tight embrace.
‘I miss you a wh0le lot,’ he whispers.
I am overwhelmed with emotions I wrap my hands around him and for a few minutes we stay in that position.
‘Babe.’
I abruptly pull away from him when I hear Mel’s voice.
‘We have to go,’ he says coldly, he is angry I know.
‘I have to go,’ I tell Elijah.
‘Sure.’
He walks away instantly.
Mel looks at me and shakes his head.
We silently walk to his car.
‘What was the meaning of that?’
‘What?’
‘You and your Ex holding each other like that, have you no respect for our relationsh¡p.’
‘I am sorry I got carried away.’
‘Don’t take my love for granted.’
‘I said I am sorry,’ I snap at him
He shakes his head again, ‘I think I better get going I will see you later in the evening.’
‘Okay.’
‘That’s all you will say?’
‘What do you want me to say?’
‘At least beg me not to go.’
‘Mel.’
Angie comes running after us, ‘We have to go girl.’
‘Ya.’
‘I will see you later,’ I tell Mel
‘Whatever!’ he gets into his car and drives off.
‘And then?’
‘He is upset because he found Elijah holding me in his arms.’
‘Zen.’
‘It just happened.’
‘You still love Elijah,’ she says accusingly
‘No I don’t.’
‘You can’t lie to me.’
‘I just missed seeing him that’s all I love Mel.’
‘Okay.’
‘I am telling the truth.’
‘Okay,’ she raises her hands up in surrender.
‘We better get going.’
‘Cool.’
We make it home in time for lunch, Koko is excited to see us, she just can’t believe I have finally graduated, her hærd work has paid off, from now henceforth I will take care of her like she took care of me.
‘Zen!’ Koko startles me from my trance.
‘Yes.’
‘Are you okay?’
‘Yes,’ I lie
Angie looks at me and shakes her head.
I shoot her a deadly stare.
‘I didn’t say anything oh.’
‘Let it remain like that.’
‘Am I missing something?’ Koko asks
‘No.’
‘I know you Zen.’
‘It’s nothing Koko.’
‘Okay.’
There is a silence for a few minutes, I know Koko won’t let this go suddenly we hear Carter crying in the other room, Sherister stands up but I stop her.
‘I will get him,’ I tell her
‘Running won’t save you.’
‘Ah Koko.’
‘Go and get the baby.’
I hurriedly leave the room for the bedroom.
I scoop Carter in my arms and k-ss his forehead.
‘Hey!’
He stops crying.
I spend a few minutes with Carter before I walk back to the dining room and hand the baby to Sherister it seems he wants to s-ck.
My phone vibrates at the same time.
‘I am sorry for driving off like that, I just love you a lot Zen.’
It’s Mel.
‘It’s okay,’ I reply.
‘Can I see
‘See you.’
‘Later hun.’
‘You’ve hærdly touched your food,’
‘Elijah is back Koko.’
‘I thought I saw someone like him at school.’
‘He is the one.’
‘And you are confused?’
I nod my head.
‘The truth shall set you free.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Be truthful to yourself, you will know what to do.’
‘Okay.’
‘Deep down you know what you want, like I said at first, follow your heart.’
‘Thank you Koko.’
Zen!!!💙🖤💙🖤
FRIDAY*
*26th January* ,
*Diary Entry 50*
 
Dear Diary,
 
“After ages, if there is no more scribbling on you, be strong enough to keep this day alive.”
Have I told you how much I love and appreciate you diary for being a good and supportive friend, well here it goes, you are the best thing that happened to me, you were my first friend and you gave me a listening ear when no one else did so I am grateful to you.
****
I have been sitting in my room for over an hour thinking of what to do, I am stuck between a rock and a hærd place, I know I haven’t gotten over Elijah but I can’t hurt Mel, he has been so good to me.
I am still deep in my thoughts when my phone buzzes, I pick it up and read the text from Mel.
‘Babe we need to talk.’
‘About?’
‘I am coming over soon.’
‘Can’t this wait till dinner?’
‘No.’
‘Is there a problem?’
‘I am coming over Babe.’
‘Okay.’
I wonder what he wants to talk about, I wait patiently for him, he calls me after an hour or so to say he is outside.
I grab my phone and walk out of my room.
‘Where to?’
‘I need to talk to Mel he is outside.’
‘Okay.’
I open the door and step out then I shut it behind my back.
‘Hey.’
‘Hey,’ he says as he pecks my cheeks.
‘Tsup.’
‘Can we drive somewhere private?’
‘Okay.’
He opens the car door for me and I jump in, when he gets into the car, he turns it on and speeds into the main road.
Mel is quieter than usual during the drive to God knows where.
‘Are you okay?’ I ask breaking the silence
He manages a smile, ‘Yes I am.’
‘Okay.’
After driving for several minutes he parks the car in the middle of nowhere, this place looks des**ted.
He steps out of his car then he comes round and opens the door for me.
‘What are we doing here?’ I demand
‘We need to talk.’
‘Here?’ I give him a questioning look.
‘Yes.’
‘I am all ears.’
‘You know that I love you right?’
‘Yes,’ I respond confused
‘The first day I set my eyes on you I was instantly attracted to you, there was just something about you, the way you talk, your smile you are special Zen.’
‘Babe!’ I hold his hand
‘I love you a lot Zen.’
‘And I love you too.’
He smiles.
‘I love you and I just want you to be happy.’
‘I am happy.’
‘No you are not.’
‘Babe!’
‘I am letting you go Zen.’
‘What? Why?’
My heart slams hærd against my chest.
‘When I decided to be with you I knew you were still in love with Elijah well I took a chance on you….’
‘Babe,’ I cut him short.
‘Let me finish.’
‘The past few months have been awesome, you are fun to be with, I like your innocence, I like how pure you are but you don’t belong to me, it’s Elijah you should be with, it’s him you love.’
‘Come on Babe, I love you, I chose you and I am not leaving.’
‘I know if it were up to you, you would stay with me forever but the heart wants what it wants and right now your heart wants Elijah.’
‘Babe!’ tears flood my eyes
‘I love you enough to let you go, your happiness matters more to me.’
I open my mouth to respond but I quickly shut it. He holds my hand and I can’t help it, tears stream down my face.
He pulls me to him and wraps his arms around me.
‘Don’t feel bad, you will be okay.’
I sniff, ‘I am sorry.’
‘It’s not your fault I will always be here for you whenever you need me.’
‘Thank you.’
‘We all deserve second chances, forgive him but if he hurts you again ama break his heart.’
I smile
When spend the next few minutes talking, he cracks a few jokes to make me laugh, Mel is a good man I hope he finds someone deserving of his love.
*****
Saturday
June 23th 2018
I am in awe of God’s love for me, what shall I render to him for he has been so good to me.
I now believe what they say about dry seasons in one’s life. The dry season is not God’s rejection but his season of preparation.
You know they were times in my life when I felt forgotten and at times I thought I would never become anything in life now see how God has turned my life around.
Anyway today is a good day because I just launched ‘Perfect Imperfections’ it hasn’t been an easy ride but the vision had to be birthed- the story had to be told.
Jessie helped me each step of the way, she even footed the bill for my book to get published, that woman is heavenly sent.
So for the next few weeks I have scheduled interviews and I will be doing a book tour starting next week.
Monday
June 25, 2018
I am in my office editing the report for the project I am spearheading when my phone rings, I pick it up and answer without checking the caller id.
‘My writer!’
‘Mel!’ I exclaim
‘How are you?’
‘I am okay you?’
‘I am great.’
‘It’s been a while.’
‘I have been busy.’
‘When are you coming back?’
‘I should be back in time for our trip to Marburg.’
‘That’s good.’
‘I received my copy of Perfect imperfection, I must say I was impressed, I haven’t been able to put it down.’
I smile, ‘Thank you.’
‘You are welcome.’
‘So I need you to write down a list of everything we will need for the Marburg trip and email it to me.’
‘Okay.’
‘Great. I have to go now.’
‘Okay.’
‘Bye.’
He hangs up, well even if Mel and I aren’t together anymore we are still friends and we are still working hand in hand on the project to empower women and girls in rural areas. He is currently out of the country on official duties.
The day passes by so fast and before I know it, it’s time for me to knock off. I am exhausted it’s been a busy day. I pack my belongings into my handbag and walk out of the office.
I walk to Angie’s office and knock before I push the door open and walk in, she is on the phone.
I wait silently for a few minutes till she ends the call.
‘Ready to go?’
‘Ya.’
‘I am tired,’ she stands up.
‘I know.’
She packs her things and we head out of the office to the car park. I have a personal driver at work but I prefer to go with Angie unless on days when she is busy.
I just enrolled myself at a driving school though so I can learn how to drive and get my own car.
We drive straight to the hospital.
Oh did I tell you about what happened to my aunties? Well they had an accident a week ago, they had both gone out to drink and when coming back they collided with another car, luckily no one died but they will be charged with driving under the influence of alcohol once they recover.
Auntie Naomi’s condition is critical, she lost her leg but Auntie Jenny is doing better she didn’t have too many injuries. Her husband though doesn’t want anything to do with her, he said she left her home just to come and misbehave with her sister.
Anyway we get to the hospital and I find Sherister by the entrance.
‘Hey.’
‘Hey.’
‘You just got here?’
‘Ya.’
‘Carter?’
‘He is with Koko at home.’
Koko hasn’t been to the hospital for days now she says they are reaping what they sowed.
I had them moved to a private hospital so they can get better treatment.
‘Thank you,’ Sherister says
‘For what?’
‘For everything.’
‘It’s okay.’
Angie clears her throat and I stare at her, she is not in support of me helping my Aunties but I don’t repay evil for evil.
‘And I am sorry on behalf of my auntie’s and uncle for all the years of maltreatment.’
‘It’s fine.’
‘You don’t have to help any of us but here you are doing your best to ensure they get better.’
‘They are family.’
‘I will be eternally grateful to you for helping mum and also for helping me get back to school.’
I just smile.
We get to the ward finally but the doctor tells us to wait outside.
Wait, Uncle Steve hasn’t yet visited his sisters and his phone is off, from what I heard from Rister, he is having issues at his work place.
Anyway, that aside I am doing what I can do to help but like Koko said they are all reaping what they sowed.
Zen🖤💙🖤💙🖤💙
👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻
*TBC*