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My crazy Housewife batch 3

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👰MY CRAZY HOUSEWIFE 👰

(she’s psycho 😂 and troublesome 🙆)

Collaboration story 📝

Episode 5

🎲STEVE🎲
“I was just…sending an Email to someone” I stuttered and acted like I just switched off the laptop.

She rolled her eyes.
“Whatever, let’s just go already” she said and started walking to the door.

I fixed my belt and grabbed my car keys and phone.

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Thank God,
She didn’t catch me….

Soon, we heard a thud..
Tessy froze and looked back.

“What’s that sound?” She asked me and am forced to look at the table where Vanessa was hiding.

“I don’t know, let’s go” I jibed trying to hold her.

She yanked her hands off and stood at the center of the office.

“Is there someone else here?”she asked, I don’t know why but my heart starts to race.

She went behind the table,
“Come out b*tch” she said and Vanessa crawled out.

Tessy glared at her and to my suprise, Vannesa lowered her head looking embarrassed.

“Do you have boyfriend?” Tessy asked her

“Y..yes” she muttered.

“Does he have a d!ck?” Tessy asked

What?
What sought of question is that 😂

Vanessa just nodded.

Tessy left her and came to me.
“Let’s go you man slut!” She said and left.

She looked a bit angry.
Pregnant pepper 😱 She’ll surely deal with me
I sense revenge
I glanced at Vanessa before leaving .

🎲🎲🎲🎲AT THE GYM: YOGA

Tessy and I got to the gym and she changed her clothes to a singlet and leggings.
It’s soothes her so well and brought out her curves.
I couldn’t take my eyes off her pointy n**ples which was glooming from her light singlet.

Thank God this is a women’s gym if not I would have dealt with alot of guys who stare at her.

Oh Tessy,
I hate you but I can’t stop wanting to touch your body.

We got to the area of the yoga. There were four women on a blue mat also in their leggings stretching.

Tessy had a red mat…. It soothes her, Red pepper 😒

She handed me her water bottle roughly and glared at me before kneeling on her mat.

I sat on a chair close to her.

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Two of the women had bulgy tummy and the others, there tummy was as big as f***

“Your hubby came with you, how sweet of him! He must be crazy over you” the fattest woman said.

I rolled my eyes.
Can women ever be quiet.

Tessy sighed.

“I doubt that. Look at me, am I ugly?” Tessy asked and I sat up to listen to them.

🚺No dear!
🚺you’re s£xy!
🚺 strawberry 🍓 honey!

The women 👩👵 👩 replied at once.

“Am attractive right?
Then how come my husband is too blind to see good things? He’s cheating on me!!!” Tessy bursted out.

The women looked at me at once.
Glaring and shaking in disgust.
What is Tessy doing,?

Why is she casting me?

“, how could you do such a thing?!!!?” One of the lady shouted at me.

“Have you no shame?” The other asked me pointing.

Oh geeexxxxx
How do I get out of this?
What do I say?

“No no no, stop attacking him. He’s not my husband, he’s my personal driver” Tessy said.

What? 😨😓
Me? A driver??

“My husband, the idiot is at home. He doesn’t care about me 😭, he thinks am a burden. All the idiot wants is s3x! He even wants to push me and my baby out of his life after I give birth!!” She said crying and whining like a child which is annoying to me.

But she just denied me infront of these women,!!
Personal driver??
Tessy is wicked..

The women left their yoga practice and rushed to Tessy, consoling and petting her.
Begging her to take heart.

“My husband is a lawyer, he can help put your husband behind bars” one of the women said.

Wtff.

Tessy shook her head.
“No, let’s spare the idiot but am sure of one thing… He’ll come begging one day. He’ll realize am a priceless jewel. That day, I’ll smash his balls with my heels 👠” she said and I quickly touched my balls.

Never, I’ll never beg her.

She looked at me and smirked.
Oh gee, am suddenly afraid of her.

Episode 6

🎲STEVE🎲
I waited for Tessy in the car very angry with what she said back at the gym.
Never in my life have I been so insulted!

Right from the day I got her laid, I brought a death wish upon myself.

She’s surely sent to kill me, but I’ll kill her first.

The door opened and she entered the car flinging our house key with her middle finger.

“You think that was funny? Seriously? You told them I was your f–king personal driver??” I barked trying so hard to suppress my anger.

“Oh plea…se, if I told them you were my husband, they would have slapped the stars out of you. Besides, if you want to have that title so much, you’ll have to stop cheating on me” she said.

I scoffed.

“Am a stinking billionaire, I do whatever I want. If dad can’t stop me, then who are you?” I asked turning on the car.

“I get it. Am nobody, no need to rub it in. You’re free to do whatever you want hun, even sleep with a goat” she said and I clenched my fist.

I swear I might kill her with my bare hands.

She’s too annoying!

We hit the road.

She pressed some button at the music player and a list of songs popped up. Written by Eunice Nwodu…do not copy.

I was watching her slowly and still had my eyes on the road.

Like she knew me more than anyone else, she picked Lil Wayne’s song.
I don’t like his songs and Tessy knows that but she’s just mrs Annoyer!

She increased the volume and the horrible tune came blasting from all sides of the car.
Oh lord…help me.

“Can you turn that off please? I don’t want my child to listen to trash like this” I hissed.

“Oh sorry, I can’t here you!” She replied shouting.

Am sure she heard me well..!

How many months to go? Seven, seven months to go and the baby will come! We’ll split up and I’ll be a free bird again,

But come to think off it, who would be with the baby,?
Tessy would want to have her kid so that’s not an issue. I can visit the child sometimes.
I just hope mom wont come inbetween Tessy and I divorcing.
She always have her way.

Tessy turned of the music and am forced to look at her annoying face.

“I want raspberry” she whined pouting like a child.

“The only place we can get that is at Milly’s Beverages and it’s kinda far from here….you should have said it when we were at the gym, it’s closer from there” I stated turning around.

“Stop blaming me,.. I wasn’t feeling like it then. Please drive fast before I loose appetite for it” she said.

I rolled my eyes and increased the speed passing the speed limit of that street.

“Awwn, you’re such a caring hubby, see how fast you’re going to attend to my needs” she said sounding like snow white.

I scoffed.

“I just want what’s best for my baby. You’re out of the question. I care for mosquitoes more than you” I jibed.

“And those mosquitoes will be the one to give you s3x then 😒” she muttered.

“You’re not even the last person on my I_care list” I said and I knew it got to her.

“F–k you, you bloody liar!” She blurted and folded her hands angrily.

I continued driving. It was now few blocks to the beverage store.

“I don’t want raspberry again, let’s go home” she said angrily.

Wtff..

” do you know how long it took me to get here??” I asked not believing this woman.

“Are you complaining??” She asked.

I scoffed.

“Whatever, we’re going to that store and that’s final” I said and sped up reaching the place.

“Am not drinking any thing then. It would be poison cause your baby don’t want it again” she said.

Crazy woman 😂

“If you refuse it, I’ll pin you down and force it down your throat. I can’t come all the way here and go back empty handed like an idiot” I said and parked the car at the parking lot.

“Huh! I hate you Steve, I hope you know that” she said still angry.

I watched her angry face,
Can this my preggy pepper get any cuter?

geez, she just said she hates me and here I am admiring her face. 😒

“Okay, let’s go home” I said and started the car

She stopped me with her soft hands on mine. How can her hands be so soft? , she was a maid….

“We can’t go, we’re already here…let’s go and buy raspberry and even cranberry juice” she said excitedly and came out of the car.

See this woman…
I thought she said she doesn’t want raspberry anymore 😂

I came out of the car and joined her in the big beverage store.

~~~~~~~`~~~~~~to be continued 😂

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