Tales of two funny ritualist episode 13 | Toriperi

Tales of two funny ritualist episode 13

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Tales of two funny ritualist
Episode 13
Me: no, I for stay make the guy catch me.
Flex: but wait, I hope you know that running isn’t the solution. E better make you find way settle that guy so that you fit leave in peace.
Me: abi?
Flex: yes.
I heard the sound of padlock again and I knew he must be going out. for no reason, I

told flex to follow me. We came out from our apartment silently, closed the doors and followed him silently.
Luckily for us, the guy turned and entered inside a beer parlor. We also entered inside the beer parlor with him but sat down at a different table.
We ordered two bottles of stout and I saw him ordered for a bottle of beer.
Me: waiter!!!!!
Waiter: yes?
Me: you see that guy wey sitdown there, I go pay for anything he drink.
Waiter: alright.
He said and went away.
Flex: you sure this money go reach, na our last card o.
Me: no fear, tomorrow we go strike our deal so in anyway, money go enter our hand.
Flex: ok oo. If you say so no problem.
Luckily for us, he didn’t order for much. He wanted to pay when the waiter told me that someone have already payed for it. The waiter also pointed to our table and i could see him stand up and moved over to us with the corner of my eye.
Talent scout: why you go pay for my drink, I tell you say I no get money to pay?
Me: haba, no be so naw. Abeg sitdown make we talk matter.
Luckily for us, he sat down and I cleared my throat before speaking….
15 Minutes later.
We are all laughing like best friends. I have succeeded in apologizing to him and he accepted. We also order for another round of drinks but luckily, he was the one that payed for it this time.
We got to know each other better and I won’t deny the fact that he is fun to be with once you understand him.
Talent scout: my guys, I need to go now, time wey I spend for here don make me late.
Me: na house you dey go?
Talent scout: no o, work.
Flex: which work you dey do?
Talent scout: company work, and I dey night shift.
Me: alright.
We both exchange handshake and he walked away.
Flex: very good, you know say e no good to get enemies for compound.
Me: yes o, you are right.
Flex: so now you fit leave like freeman, no more worries, no more running.. Hahahaha.
Me: mtcheew. Abeg make we dey go house joor.
_________________
We arrived at our compound and the time was 7:57pm. The place was already dark but

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it wasn’t quiet. They were loud noises everywhere.
Flex: Idris, e be like say dem dey quarrel o.
Me: shey, because this can noise fit wake up dead person o.
Flex: make we go check first.
We entered inside the compound and behold, a karate competition between victoriouschild and jummybabe was going on. Oga val, konami and froshberry where not around, I guess they were still in work.
I couldn’t see dencygirl too, maybe she is not yet back. that leaves only soma, who is trying her best to separate the two but her efforts were futile as the two

tigeress were tearing themselves.
Flex: you dey see w€tin I dey see.
Me: yes oo.
Flex: you sure.
Me: yes oo.
Flex: w€tin I dey see.
Me: see bobby, see bakasi. Gawdd, I no know say these girls package like this oo.
The two ladies were still fighting themselves.
Flex: chaii, I dey enjoy this fight like die,
Me: me too. Omo, see as their ynashes dey shake like kilode.
Soma: *shouting* una no go come help me??
Me: remember w€tin we dey do with fatima, the wife of okon?
Flex: yes.
Me: come make we go press free bobby.
Flex: wait first, this one wey them dey fight karate so, me dey fear oo.
Me: dey there dey fear.
Without thinking, I rushed and grabbed victoriouschild so tight that in one hold, I have made enough contact with the bobby, and lower dicotomy (bakasi).
Victoriouschild: *redirecting her anger, just the way avatar do redirect lightning* iyeee, w€tin you know say you dey do.
Jummybabe: w€tin he do.
Victoriouschild: imagine this useless boy grab by assets for free.
Jummybabe and soma: what!!!!!!
Before the count of three..
“POOAAAA”
“POOAAAA”
“POOAAAA”
I started receiving slaps from the the three ladies, including soma. The next minute, I am on the ground with mohammed Ali (victoriouschild) on top of me boxing the living hell out of me.
Five stars are too small as they increase to ten, fifteen and twenty. Now I know that I am damned for sure.
The last thing I heard was
flex: noooooo.
I never knew what happened afterwards as my eyes closed and I humbly accepted the fact of being thrown into total oblivion.
..
..
..
TBC

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