Tears of a Helpless Woman


©Pauline Bumbi
The following day my eyes were swollen and the
maids kept asking what the matter was but I
couldn’t answer.
All I wanted was to work that day without
responding to anyone. My aunty have me laundry to
do and I went into the laundry room to wash. The
mansion had two washing machines so all I had to
do was hang the clothes after they left the machine.
while I was searching the clothes before putting
them in the machine I found K300 in my uncles
trousers. A part of me wanted me to keep it
because i thought of everything I needed but my
heart couldn’t find peace so I decided to keep the
money for my uncle.
He was not around at that time and I waited for him
to come home for lunch.
Around 13hours I heard a hoot at the gate, it was
my uncle who had just come home. So I rushed to
the front and as soon as he pulled over I greeted
“What do i owe the greetings?” He responded as he
left the car.
“Uncle I found this money in your pocket as I was
doing laundry” I said as I extended my hands to
hand him the money.
My uncle stopped and looked at me from head to
toe and then got the money, after counting through
it he looked at me again.
“Where did you say you got this money from
again ?” He asked.
“Your grey trousers, the one you wore yesterday” I
“I did not put any money in that trousers and in fact
my wallet equally didn’t have money” he responded.
I was shocked and wondered what was going on.
My uncle returned the money to me and told me to
keep it instead.
“But don’t you think you should ask aunty first?
Maybe it’s hers” I suggested.
Before my uncle could answer my aunt came out.
“Ask aunty what? What do you want him to ask me?
Honey see what I meant when I said this child is
the devils advocate?” My aunt said angrily.
I was shocked and I started shaking wondering
what she was talking about.
“I lost a K300 in the house and she denied it, I
asked her and even demanded that she would leave
this house if she does not return it… Now foolishly
she decides to play his trick. She is a pathetic liar!!!
My aunty yelled
Those words echoed through my ears like a very
loud trumpet and I already knew that i would not
exculpate myself.
“Did you do it? Answer me you devil!!! Yelled my
I looked at him with no strength to respond, I just
shook my head.
Tears were already washing my cheeks and i feet
became numb.
I thank God that neither of them laid hands on me
but I was asked to leave immediately.
My wh0le world was crushing but in between the
crying and the state of confusion I managed to
smile at my aunty and uncle.
My uncle asked me to use that money to go to the
village, a place last saw when I was in 12.
Where would I even start from?anyway, according to
many tales I heard.. It was impossible to get lost in
the village as everyone knew the other.
With the sack bag that I used to keep my clothes, I
left the mansion around 14hours to go and start my
life afresh. I was numb to everyth
ing at that hour. I
couldn’t feel any pain, i was in a state of shock.
All I could remember was saying to my uncle
” I did not choose anything in this world, I only
chose happiness. Because everything was decided
for me”.
I don’t know what I was thinking but I
communicated all my feelings through that
My fellow maids cried bitterly and they said they
envied me. I didn’t understand why because they
had everything better than I did. But they assured
me the God I trusted in would help me.
My sack was heavy because I packed all my novels
and only two dresses and a small blanket.
I thought of the journey to the village and how long
it would be. How my life would turn out there.
Maybe I would be married off the moment I got
there, maybe my grandmother would no longer be
As i walked with the huge sack bag on my head I
thought of aunty Patricia, the woman who had
always wished me well. I had to see her somehow
but I didn’t want to bother her anymore than I
already did.
A thousand thoughts rushed through my head at the
same time and I sang my school hymns again.
A picture of my mother crossed my head and she
was smiling at me, she was still as beautiful as I
could remember
A car stopped in front of me and one angry looking
lady came out yelling.
“Have you lost your mind?? do you want to die!!!
Why are you walking in the centre of the road and
not moving when I hooted!” She yelled.
“Calm down!!” A voice shouted from the car.
I didn’t see the person but it was a male voice.
“Am sorry I did not hear you” I responded calmly.
I was frustrated but that woman looked more
frustrated than I was. The car drove off in full
speed leaving dust particles everywhere.
I kept on walking down the road until I couldn’t
walk no more.
I had walked for 3hours and now my neck was
aching from the heavy load.
I put the sack bag down and sat on it, evening was
approaching and I had to find a place to sleep.
Town was nearer to the mansion but for some
reason I had taken the opposite direction and I was
now in an area filled with many plots , some places
had houses while others had unfinished buildings or
just bare land.
I guess my intentions were to find some unfinished
building were I could pass the night.
I knew the area but the furthest I went was the first
phase where we usually bought charcoal for the
I was under an oak tree looking at the sky and
wondering where I would go from there. Many cars
passed along the gravel road and no one bothered
to stop or to lower the window just to look at me. I
guess a person like me would never be noticed.
I turned the sack bag upright and got my bible
which I had placed on top so I could easily reach
it. After closing the sack bag I turned it over again
and I sat on it.
Just after saying a short prayer I opened my Bible
Deuteronomy 31:8
“It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with
you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not
fear or be dismayed”
It’s like heaven was smiling on me upon reading
that scripture, I did not have a place to go or
anyone I could lean on but those words alone were
my source of comfort. I smiled to myself as I
closed the bible.
“Life you can’t do anymore harm to me” I said to
“Are you looking for a job” a man said to me as he
parked just before me.
A black Mercedes Benz just like my uncles had
parked before me and here I was staring at the man
who had uttered those words.
“Sir are you talking to me?” I asked as my eyes
focussed on him.
To be continued.. 
NEXT (episode 5)                                                                             PREVIOUS (episode 3)

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