Vanity Episode 22

© Akoto Alexander 

In a private hospital in town after Esi Haizel closed from work she drove there to see if she was in danger or not, she went to see the doctor in the consultation room and lied to her that she hadn’t seen her menses for some weeks now and she is suspecting that she is pregnant but she wants to surprise her husband so she wants the doctor to run a pregnancy test on her, the doctor did and confirmed that she was 3weeks pregnant, someone who claimed she wanted to surprise her husband and should have been happy with the pregnancy results started crying, the doctor felt it was tears of joy but little did she know wahala don come, Esi took her sorry self out of the hospital and drove to her house in sorrow, she failed to even eat that night and also refused to answer any calls that came through her phone, Eddysongs and Adjoa Wusua tried her line about 75 to 80 times each but there was no answer, Adjoa became worried and even decided to go and check up on her friend but she remembered she wasn’t having a driver’s license so she decided to stay home rather and do the checking up the next day. Esi on the other hand was thinking of an escape route because her personal doctor who has been taking care of her medical problems has warned her that if she ever tried an abortion again that will the end of her life and since she was now about to enjoy life she dare not take that step leading to any form of abortion, now her greatest worry was who would be the father of his unborn child, hmmmm now that I have gotten a rich and handsome guy in my life see this bad luck that has come my way, infact the witches and wizards in my house are really stocking me and they don’t want to see me progress in life but my God won’t allow that, I will sleep over it and find a lasting solution to my predicament. The next day she woke up with heavy eyes because she cried all throughout the night and she decided not to go to work but she immediately remembered she now has a wh0le department to supervise so she dare not stay in the house, as she checked her phone she was having about 215 missed calls from Adjoa Wusua, Eddysongs and some unknown numbers, she freshened up and dressed up for work but before leaving her house she wore a big sunglasses to cover her heavy eye balls, Adjoa kept calling but Esi won’t just answer her calls, as Esi got to her office she received a car that the boss was looking for her and the sound of the call sounded very urgent, she for once felt scared if possibly Elder Akyeah had said he wasn’t working alone and that he even used some of the money to buy a car for her, well whatever it was she decided to face it when she got to Eddysongs office. She was offered a seat when she got there because Eddysongs was on phone when she entered the office, after his lengthy call he dropped the phone and what he said brought shock to Esi.

Eddysongs: My dear am supposed to travel to Dubai for a business meeting, I am to go with you because the business deal concerns your department, the person you saw me speak with on phone works at the passport office, I have given details of you to him and he’s expecting you now to come and take your photograph so he starts processing you passport so stop everything you doing now and move straight to the passport office. But I don’t know why you have been avoiding my calls since yesternite, if you had answered my call you would have got to the passport office straight from your house to complete everything there.

Esi Haizel:(feeling very excited within her knowing that she was going to travel outside the country for the first time) Oh please forgive me, the touch of my phone has been worrying me which has prevented me from answering calls, am sorry it was deliberate but I have observed you are not cheerful and that since last Sunday you havent said anything rom-ntic to me and neither have you held or touched me like a man does to the woman. Have I done anything wrong?

Eddysongs: Far from that my lady, just imagine the things that has been taking place in the office since yesterday, my mind is occupied with a lot of things, your predecessor stole over 70million cedis from this company which is a great worry to me but don’t worry after we are done with the business transaction in Dubai we will spend quality time together so dont worry yourself or your head at all, will be yours in some few days time.

Esi Haizel: Mmmmm that sounds tempting my love, brace yourself for a rough ride my prince charming for I have mindblowing styles for you, I will make you run and leave your boxers behind.

Eddysongs: Hahahahaha the last lady who gave me such caution ended up leaving her G-string p-nt in my room ooo my baby girl, am a meriless dude, when I unleash my thing on you mercy will be far away from you. But whatever it is we shall see.

He rose to his feet came close to Esi and spank her ass and tells her to rush to the passport office.

Now in the house of Nana Yaw he was at the dining table with Adjoa Wusua when a call came through his phone.

Caller: Hello good morning sir, am I speaking with the Chief Executive Officer of NAYAD Logistics Limited?

Nana Yaw: Precisely, am the one and how may I be of help to you because if its a business related issue I will plead with you to call the office lines because I am on sick leave for now.

Caller: Oh sorry about that sir but it seems the purpose of calling is very important and am sorry I will be the conveyor of this bad news to you. Well our elders say it’s a man who swallows a bitter pill and am sorry to inform you that your biggest cargo sh¡p and all the containers on board has sunk on the Pacific ocean.

Nana Yaw: Whaaaaaat what did you say?

Caller: Please sir you heard me very right, sorry for you loss. May God be with you. (The call ends)

Adjoa Wusua: My dear is everything alright?

Nana Yaw: I wish what I was told is not true, Adjoa I have just been informed that my biggest cargo sh¡p together with all my containers and things I imported has sunk on the Pacific ocean.

Adjoa Wusua: Oh my God, how did it happen and why now? I believe you have insured the company and the sh¡p?

Nana Yaw: Hmmmm the sh¡p insurance expired just last week and I planned doing so when it docks at the harbour and now see what has just happened, I had invested millions of dollars into this import because I wanted to lift the company much higher and invite more investors and clients into my business. Well it has happened already and there is nothing anyone can do about it, mmmmm Adjoa I have been thinking about you and your source of livelihood, I don’t like it so I have bought a store for you and stocked it with provisions at the central market, it’s a supermarket and I trust you can handle it well but along the line if the business grows well, I will give you a task to perform for me, my chief bodyguard well take you to the place, your workers are already there waiting for you, as you take leave I will make some calls to confirm if the news I got is true. Please push me to the hall so I can watch tele, it seems the graphic man didn’t bring me today’s papers.

Adjoa pushed Nana Yaw to the hall and got the tv remote for Nana Yaw to select his preferred channel, as he put the tv on something happened……….

When things start to fall apart the centre cannot hold, be ready to dance the warrior dance when you beat the battle drum!!!!


As soon as Nana Yaw switched the tv on there was this breaking news been telecast and every station he tuned in was telecasting the same thing, the headline was that the airport was on fire, as the news went on it became clear that a plane had caught fire and was burning seriously but not the wh0le airport which was on fire, as a matter of fact the fire incident was on the runway, Nana Yaw changed the station again and he was on time to get an important news, the reporter of the station made it clear that the plane which was on fire was not a passenger plane and that it was a private plane, it happened that the plane was brought out from its hunger to the runway for it to be fuelled and a little maintenance be done on it and the next thing everyone saw was fire gusting out of the plane, eye witnesses close by claim they never saw any smoke or signs of fire when the wh0le thing started and what started this wh0le fire thing was a mystery. We are still gathering information to find out which plane that got burnt because I have it on record that in this airport there are 2 private planes here so I will gather more information and get back to you our loyal viewers.

Nana Yaw felt a bit worried because he owned a private plane and it was at the same venue the reportage came from, he changed the channel and as he did the details of the plane that got burnt was on display, his phone rang immediately

Caller: Hello good morning sir, please is this Mr Adane Dankyi?

Nana Yaw: Speaking

Caller: Sir am very sorry to inform you that you private plane at the airport caught fire some minutes back and the fire officers at the airport tried their possible best to curtail the fire but unfortunately their efforts didn’t yield any positive results. Its very unfortunate but we will need you at the airport as soon as possible because you need to sign some doc-ments for your insurance company and the fire service to start any interim investigations on the fire scene.

Nana Yaw: (drops the call and scre-ms out loud) Adjoa please can you go with me to the airport, the plane you seeing on the screen is mine and I have to sign some doc-ments there before the fire officers and my insurance company can start an investigation, am lucky I just did a renewal of my insurance some few days to my birthday if not I will be in hot soup, hahahahaha the devil is a liar and he has failed woefully this time around. Please get me my medicine first then after that we leave for the airport, I will call the supervisor at your supermarket to wait for you further because we might stay long at the airport and that reminds me, I will get your supermarket insured so that should incase the unexpected happen you will have a backup plan to rely on. Adjoa drove Nana Yaw to the airport whiles his bodyguards followed in another car, they got there and all the tv channels were still present still taking coverage on the derby and the moment Nana Yaw was taken out of the car all the reporters and their camera crew rushed to him for an interview, now information had been released as to who owned the burnt airplane.

Esi Haizel at that time also got to the passport office and as she got there the man who was leading her to acquire the passport made her pass through the backdoor and she went to take her photograph, it was after she was done that she saw on the tv what had taken place at the airport, she saw Adjoa Wusua standing next to Nana Yaw in his wheelchair and answering questions thrown to him by the reporters.

The person who called Nana Yaw earlier on to inform him of that tragedy came to meet him and led the way to the office where the doc-ments were going to be signed for the fire officers and insurance company to commence their investigations.

Meanwhile Eddysongs had also left the office to the fraternity meeting place, he had a bone to pick with his holy eminence.

Eddysongs:(greets his holy eminence in the fraternity way) My Lord I so need you help in this plight of mine, if you don’t assist me I will become a laughing stock in the public domain, some of us have served this fraternity diligently, I have brought people to this fraternity and that alone can’t be compared to any member of this brotherhood.

Personally you made me undertake wicked and mindblowing missions for you to get the position you are occupying, my Lord you promised me comfort in this world and now is the time that I would like you to reciprocate that kind gesture to me now.

Holy Eminence: Edward Ansong you know what you are asking for is not possible, everyone in this fraternity has a price to pay, some have to sacrifice their family members, whiles others sacrifice their manh-od, other keep bringing unthinkable things as sacrifice. You are even lucky you have everything on you intact and that your manh-od is even working, you were supposed to impregnate 12 mad women this year as at now how many have you gotten pregnant?

Eddysongs: Do you think that it easy for me huh, do you know how it is to have s€× with a woman who hasn’t taken her bath for months and some years, do you know how difficult I find it to get me manh-od er-cted just to penetrate that smelling place, just imagine going to bed with a normal person who hasn’t even taken her bath for 12hours not to talk about someone who for months and years haven’t bath, for you information now the mad women in my area chase after my car anytime I pass by any of them.

Holy Eminence: Then move out from that comfort zone of yours, are you not the same person who vowed to do anything just to be rich, you think you can eat you cake and have it back, have you wondered why am always in a hat? Do you think is because I love hat some much (He takes off his hat and the sour he had on his head and maggots that were playing around on his head was disguisting).

Eddysongs: My God!!!

Holy Eminence: Shut the hell up, haven’t I warned you never to mention that name over here again, leave this place now before I curse you with manh-od er-ction all your life.

Eddysongs: Please forgive me my Lord but for once there is this lady I want to go to bed with, even if it will course her life after some few days I don’t care.

Holy Eminence: Hmmmmm you have a big task ahead of you then, in so doing you must get a liver of a lion, the heart of a crocodile, the egg of an eagle and lastly the private hair of an old lady, in so doing you can now swap from sleeping with mad women and do it with any ordinary woman but that person will die in 21days time. Your fate lies in your palms. Have a good day

Hmmmm don’t envy your brother when you see most people riding around town in expensive cars, most are doing outside gentlity and crying home, it’s better to eat your gari and hot pepper without fi sh in peace rather than eating fried rice and chicken with fruit juice and cry later. Some of our brothers are really suffering under their beautiful clothes

To be continued

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