WHEN I FALL 🍂 🌊
BY RUTHIE LEE 🌸 🌸
“Don’t come any closer!” I warned.
“I won’t!” she sniffed. “Because of you sir, Joseph, because of you, I’m ashamed of who I am for the first time!”.
Because of me?
If anyone can transform to what she transformed into, they should be ashamed because of anyone. That was a frightening view.
“Sir, Joseph, honestly, I mean no harm… But then the expression on your face….
Droplets of tears crawled down her face, and suddenly my head snapped back to my dream where she was drowning in her own tears. Dreams can be a little extra, maybe what my dream really meant was, she has been crying since I left.
“And then you called me a monster!” she sniffed. “I don’t know but the word felt true but also felt like a knife was pierced to my chest”.
I didn’t say a word, I just let her do all the talking.
“But then again, I am a monster!” she wiped her tears. “I’ve killed… Killed people! And killing people kind of makes you a monster right?” she said and looked down at her palms..
Remind me why I’m still standing here.
Kathleen raised her head up and seeing my expression she quickly starts to explain.
“But i didn’t kill them just because I wanted to kill them, I killed them because I trusted them and revealed my identity to them, and then they tried to expose and kill me. I didn’t have a choice!”
“But then again, you killed people?” I finally found my voice. “And you showed me who you truly are, what makes you think I won’t think about you killing me too?”
“Because I will never!” she sniffed.
“It’s not every word you trust, and it’s not everyone you trust!” I said as I took a step back.
Hell I was scared but I hid that frightened expression.
She took a step forward. “You’re different from them sir, Joseph, I understand why you ran, I do now, you didn’t try to harm me but they did!”
“What if I decided to suddenly harm you or try to expose you like they did, then you’d probably kill me right?” I asked sternly.
She shook her head. “You’re not like them!”.
“That is not the answer to my question.” I said. “if i happen to want to harm you like they did, I’ll probably be eliminated by you right?”
She shook her head, negatively. “You’re different,” she starts to cry.
Well, her answer is probably telling me if I try to harm she’ll kill Me too.
This is just perfect.
“Still didn’t Answer my question” I muttered and starts to walk away. I have to leave again, and never come back.
I can’t trust her.
Seriously what have I gotten myself into.
“Sir, Joseph” I heard her call behind me and I could tell she was following me.
I ignored her calling and still walked to my room, to get my phone so I would leave in peace.
Kathleen kept calling me but I ignored her,
I grabbed my phone from my room and walked out, thankfully Kathleen was nowhere to be found.
I walked to the living room door ready to go outside and my heart skipped a beat when I saw Kathleen standing by the door, her hands behind her back.
“Sir, Joseph!” she sniffed.
“What? What do you want now?” I asked, thankful that Mary is sound asleep I should have left her in the car if I had known that I would be leaving again and Kathleen was still here and has happened to be a killer.
I adjusted Mary on my shoulder and moved back.
“Please don’t leave!” Kathleen stated.
“Why wouldn’t I, there’s a non human in my house and there’s a seventy percent chance you’re going to try to harm me or Mary, so why wouldn’t I leave!” I stated.
“I can’t harm either you or Mary, please just believe me!” she stated.
“I can’t believe you Kathleen, now please for Christ’s sake, leave my daughter and I alone!” I yelled, getting angry.
Mary flinched from her sleep but I quickly pat her back to calm her down.
Kathleen starts to shed tears again.
Like seriously! I’m tired of all this. I wish everything would go back to the way it is, without me knowing who she really is, I really used to enjoy her company, but now knowing who she is, it’s just scary.
“Are you that scared of me? How can I make you stay?” she asked.
She can’t make me stay.
“Yes I am scared of you, who wouldn’t be?” I scoffed angrily.
“But why? I would never harm you, if that’s what you’re thinking sir Joseph!” she sniffed.
I’ve seen her laugh all of the days we’ve spent and now seeing her cry is actually heart breaking.
“Actions are way better than words!” I tell her.
There is no way i can be sure she can never harm me.
“Don’t you think I would have harmed you if I wanted to, but no cause you and Mary are the only people I got now, please don’t leave!” she shook her head. “And you’re right, actions are way better than words.”
Surprisingly Kathleen hands that were behind her back suddenly came forward and she was holding a knife in one hand.
And I recognized the knife from my kitchen.
“Wh…what are you doing?…” I stuttered moving back and already getting scared.
Is she going to kill me?
“I’m making a promise, the way promises are made our way and also betting my life on the line! Like you said actions are better than words!” Kathleen expound making my jaw dropped.
My eyes watched as she placed the knife in her palm and sliced her flesh giving it an opening that made blood gush out immediately.
My eyes widen as she shut her eyes enduring the pain she just caused for herself.
“Kathleen!…” I was scared of her but now I’m scared for her.
“Don’t stop me!” she shook her head as she balled her hand into a fist, letting the blood fall from the lines of her fingers.
And she started. “And with this, I promise sir, Joseph, I promise little Mary, that I will never harm them in any way, and the day I do shall be the end of me.”
My jaw dropped fully with Kathleen saying all that.
Did she just bet her life on our lives??
She shut her eyes and threw the knife of the floor.
“Now will you stay?” she opened her eyes again. “I just swore with my life and believe me it will be the end of me if I try to harm you or Mary!”
All that for me to stay? What does she want to do with me? Why me?
Why does she have to go this far.
Well it’s good for her to go this far to prove innocence. But still…
I was dumbfounded, I was lost, I was speechless, I couldn’t utter a single word.
Should I trust her on this one? I asked myself.
She just proved her innocence how can you not believe that, when blood is involved, you should believe!’ my subconscious stated.
Can I actually stay?.
“Say something, sir, Joseph!” she pleaded.
I’m taking a very dangerous decision but still, I’ve got nothing to lose.
I walked away from her and into my room, I placed Mary on my bed and dropped my phone, wallet and car keys on my desk.
I turned to my door and I saw Kathleen standing there and smiling with tears in her eyes.
Guess she must be happy I’m taking this path.
“Thank you for staying!” she said.
For what I’ve seen, I might stay and leave tomorrow.
Let’s just say, I trust her for ‘now’.
But I must be very cautious.
I walked out of my room and into the kitchen, Kathleen followed me and it was just sad. Was she trying to tie me down or what?
I grabbed the first aid kit from the kitchen and walked to the living room.
Sitting on the couch and placing the first aid kit on the table.
I raised my head up to see Kathleen standing six feet away from me. Her hands folded in front of her and blood dripping from her left hand.
I cleared my throat. “Come closer…” I said calmly.
Kathleen wiped her tears with her hands and walked up to me…
“Give me your hand” I said pointing to the one bleeding.
She showed me her hand and damn the cut was deep. It gave me a cringy type of feeling.
My hand shakily took her hand, but I steady myself and cleanse the wound. She flinched when I added the iodine, just like every normal person.
If only was she normal.
I bandaged her hand and she held up the most happy smile ever.
Minutes ago I was running away from her, but now she’s recieving hospitality from me.
Yeah, well you’re welcome to say my life’s a real bullsh*t.
“Thank you!” Kathleen smiled as she placed her bandaged hand on her chest.
“It’s nothing!” I said, stood up and went to drop the first aid box.
As I walked in the living room, I noticed the drop of blood that had stain the rug, and it made me sigh.
“I… I’ll get it cleaned!” Kathleen shouted.
I looked up at her “Okay!” was the only thing I said before walking in my room and closing the door behind me.
I walked to the bed and seeing Mary, I sighed.
We’ve both had one heck of a day.
I laid down on the bed about to sleep when Mary woke up. Her eyes looked around the room and seeing me she starts to cry.
Why is she crying when I’m lying here.
I took her in my arms and pat her back, but she wouldn’t stop crying. A knock came in at the door and when it opened it was Kathleen. I know I’ve decided to stay but still seeing her, I’m reminded of what she is but then put my mind at ease when I recalled the oath she took, but my mind wasn’t at full ease.
“She must be hungry!” Kathleen suggested, standing by the door.
“Yeah I guess so” I said, and whinced as Mary pulled my hair.
“But it’s okay, you can leave, I’ll go make lunch for her!” I said standing up.
“Oh, okay!” Kathleen said. “But you can’t hold her and make her food at the same time. I can hold her if you want me to!”
I paused and went into deep thought for a while, she is right though, but still having her touch Mary, I’m scared.
“Is there something wrong?” Kathleen asked, seeing me hold on to Mary more tightly and also being hesitant.
“Nothing is wrong!” I shook my head, I know she’ll be hurt if she finds out I’m still afraid of her.
I mean who wouldn’t be. I’m just putting on my man mode one.
“Then can I hold Mary?” she asked and I nodded and let her take Mary from me.
I prepared Mary’s food and decided to make lunch as well. I’m a little bit hungry and I guess Kathleen must be too.
Food was ready and this time I set the table myself.
Kathleen just sat quietly in a corner of the living room with Mary on her lap watching my every move.
I set the food on the table and walked up to Kathleen to get my daughter.
I took Mary to the table and starts to feed her and eat lunch.
Surprised Kathleen was sti seated there, I Turned to her.
“Aren’t you hungry?” I asked.
And suddenly she starts to cry.
I know I didn’t do anything wrong.
Mary attention turned to Kathleen, and Kathleen stood up and walked to the table. “You’re too nice for me sir, Joseph!” she sniffed, wiping her eyes.
I’m just being me, and nice must I have been to her to make her cry.
T. B. C
BY RUTHIE LEE 🌸 🌸