When Love Is Not Enough – Episode 20
The pastor called James that afternoon and asked him where he was
James told him he was in a bar drinking away his sorrow.
Pastor asked him to drive down to the church and he did.
James explained to the pastor that Michelle went back to her ex and she boldly asked for a divorce.
James went further and explained how he punched Michel’s ex and would have done more harm to him if not that he quickly drove away
James stood up and kept talking with the influence of the alcohol he took, he went on demonstrating his whole action to his pastor who was quietly listening to him.
After sometimes he broke down and placed his head on the pastor’s table before sitting hard on a chair opposite his pastor.
“Pastor… I’m just tired…I don’t know what else to do anymore, I don’t want to loose my wife…I don’t want God to count my wrongs against me but to restore my home to order… I’m tired of praying without results, reading Bible with no concentration…I don’t know what to do anymore… Michelle opened her mouth and said she hates me and she wants a divorce…I was weak the moment she said that…I couldn’t even fight or argue… she hates me and said that I decieved her, she want out of the marriage…I.. I’m just tired pastor I just want to go back to the day I met Mirabel…I will not leave my house that day…no matter how spiritual Michelle wants to be I would have accommodated her and stay home with her instead of going out and running into Mirabel… she destroyed my home, my wife’s life, my unborn child and my entire happiness. Michelle wanted to serve God pastor, i met her that way… always on fire for God, I like it whenever she Mount the pulpit to sing, her song and voice was so deep…it moves me to my knees and many others…I watch her many times while sitting among the congregation before I decided to approach her, she was so friendly and filled with deep smile and all I wanted was to make her my wife…I decided to be so serious with my faith because I know that’s what she wanted, I went to different Bible meeting, I was early to church and sit where she will see me. I read my Bible and prayed constantly…I stayed away from s£x and anything that is termed sin. I got married to her and I wanted her right away but she asked for time… after three days I had my way, she was not happy neither was I, I was impatient, pastor… she didn’t totally denied me, I could have still wait whenever she is ready….after all I waited for a year and few months before we got married but is like we are distance apart, I wanted my wife but she wanted her Bible, I became angry…so angry pastor…I couldn’t understand her because I did not want to understand, I Just wanted to have my way anytime I pleases, I wanted to enforce my authority over her and make her do my bidding…i asked her not to work because I wanted her to be a full house wife she obeyed, I come back home and my food will be waiting on the dining. sometimes special delicacy…I eat without commending her efforts because I felt is her rightful duty. to punish her further I stopped eating her food… I’m always on the phone chatting dirty chats with Mirabel, Mirabel will even tell me the colour of the undies she was putting on, she will insult Michelle by calling her different name asking me to leave my spirit filled wife and come to her…I did not stop the insult I even pass information about my wife to her which I don’t suppose to, Michelle became the centre of our small gossip… I was getting addicted and I enjoyed the look of grieve on Michelle’s face… whenever my wife comes to me at night I will leave her and sleep in another room because I really wanted to spite her for choosing her Bible over me.
James paused and looked at the pastor who urged him to continued.
“…I was in Mirabel’s place one day, I made up my mind to finally have s£x with her… with all the dirty chat my mind was corrupted, I wanted her so much, drove down to her place after work and Mirabel was ready and almost n@ked waiting to be devoured…
She helped me to put off my cloths and I was just in my undies, we kissed, had hot romance but…i just couldn’t have s£x, I asked for condom and she said she wanted skin to skin…I told her I can’t.
I asked her I to buy condom when next I’m coming. Mirabel was angry but I just wasn’t ready to compromise…I stood I wore my cloths and left… Michelle was already asleep when I got home she wanted to know why I came so late,bi ignored and walked away from her… she stood there not knowing what to do. Hmmmm… I tried again with Mirabel but I couldn’t just do it…she bought the condom but I couldn’t. after another hot romance I told her I can’t…I kept seeing Michel’s face as I lay there with her… Mirabel pleaded, asking me to do it without protection but I did not pastor…I wore my cloths again and left…but i almost did, almost…because I was already blown open…my conscience wouldn’t let me…I saw Mirabel’s n@kedness and we did things I’m not proud to say and anytime I go home I just go to bed and ignore Michelle and her food that she prepared down waiting for me… she reported me to you, I lied that I wasn’t having affair…but I was and going deeper into it and if not that Michelle saw the message Mirabel sent to me and later confronted me with it I would have gone deeper with Mirabel… Michelle suddenly changed, she got a job with her ex and started going out to ease off her sadness, I apologized and she forgive me. Michelle do not deny me intimacy anymore, she kept her Bible aside and prayed less, she even come to me herself, she wanted to satisfy me so I won’t have reasons to cheat on her again. we started praying and hoping God will bless us with a child, Michelle was worried of not conceiving no matter how we try but I told her God will do it for us since we are medically okay… and few months later God did it, he answered our prayers and Michelle was pregnant, she was jubilating… you need to see how happy she was, after trying for so long we are finally going to be parents…I was so happy pastor, we searched for baby names…for both male and female any one that chose to come first…we held hands and prayed for our unborn child… Michelle Just couldn’t wait to complete nine months… she was just too happy and so eager to have a child…all the while I thought I have outsmarted Mirabel after ignoring her, rejecting her calls and deleting her messages until she started coming to my office. pastor I looked at her sometime… looking so hot, half dressed, face painted with makeup and I’m struggling within myself to look away….I liked her but I was trying to focused on my happy pregnant wife, I even told Mirabel that Michelle was pregnant so that she can leave me alone but she didn’t and I felt foolish for even telling her more than she supposed to know… pastor I tried to let it end but I was too soft with her…I just don’t know what was wrong with me…I couldn’t even tell Michelle that Mirabel was troubling because I felt I can handle it on my own until I met her in my house and I was proud that Michelle was handling the situation well until the last stroke which broke the Carmel’s back… and before you know it Michelle was struggling with her life and the life of our unborn child… everything happened so fast, like a flash. Michelle wanted that child so much and I knew when doctor ken told me that the baby was gone…I…I.. pastor, I just knew things will never be the same again… I’m not worthy of her, I’m just an idiot who was not man enough to make things right…she changed to the woman I wanted… turning away from her Bible just to please me yet what did I do I went back kissing Mirabel because she won’t let me be in peace and now Michelle want to divorce me… wow…I just deserve whatever I’m getting. I wish she will give me another chance, I wish God will forgive me for being a total mess and turning my wife away from him. pastor you warned me when you said let my wife’s bre@st satisfy me and not of a strange woman but Michelle’s bre@st wasn’t enough for me I wanted more because I’m a selfish and wicked, a well positioned target for the devil… Pastor, I accepted my sins and I call it all out, I condemn it all. please pray for me I’m too weak…I punched the hole on the wall and the enemy penetrated in from there…I want to mend it but I don’t know how, a big damage has been done already… I’m just mess of a man… please…pray for me.
The pastor breathed deeply, he closed his eyes and opened them again before taking James hands into his.
He prayed fervently for James.
After the prayer he asked James to go and apologized to those he has offended knowingly and unknowing
To Timothy for hitting him, to Michelle’s girlfriend, Katie. Because they maybe the people God will use to bring his wife back to him and restore his home.
He read some Bible verses and prayed again asking James never to turn away from God, it was time to embrace his Bible, go on a fasting, pray without season Just like Michelle was doing in the beginning.
Now it was James turn to kick the devil out of his life and far away from his home.
James left the pastor’s office ready to do everything that his pastor asked him to do.
Michelle got to work that morning and Timothy was not in the office.
She wondered why.
she went about her day
In the afternoon when Timothy did not show up or even called she decided to call him.
Tim told Michelle that he was home, he had a blood shot eye and couldn’t come to the office but he has used eye drop and hopefully he will be at work the next day.
Michelle was worried and knew that Timothy’s black eye must have being caused by James.
She closed from work early and decided to go and see Timothy at his place.
She stopped at Katie’s office, dropped her things and told her where she was going.
“Michelle, I know we have being speaking over the phone and you told me what James did to you…I feel bad real bad…is just too terrible…he cheated on you before which made you to go search for job and you later forgive him, now his mistress without shame came over to the house, insulted you and you even have to suffer miscarriage…no… no…is really bad, to be truthful I can’t take that…is too much…I know you are vulnerable right now and you want to do anything that will make you to forget your pain but becareful with your ex, you dated Timothy and was s£xually involved with him before break up…he may want you back to him, Tim may want to take advantage of the situation and make you go come back to him…
Michelle was quiet for sometime before saying.
“Tim is a nice man, I had every opportunity to cheat on James but I didn’t, Tim could have keep pestering me since I’m working under him…he is my boss at work but he never for once act inappropriately around me, he respected the fact that I was married and I liked him for that but right now I’m not married, I’m divorcing James. James has done more harm than good… Love is not there, trust is broken, baby is gone, faith is weakened and our marriage collapse like a building… nothing to keep me and James… absolutely nothing Katie. Maybe it was supposed to be me and Tim and not James but I just wanted a God fearing man, who loves God just the way I do and who will understand me and pray with me so that our marriage will be solidly built on the rock…I thought James was such Man and got married to him but instead of building a godly marriage with me he pulled me away from my faith… Katie, you won’t understand my pain until you walk in my shoes…
Katie quickly said.
“Mich, I do not pray to walk in your shoes…infact your shoe size is bigger than mine, Is oversized Please. Anyway, becareful out there and call me if there’s anything… whatever makes you happy do it… you have being sad for too Long…
Michelle nodded quietly before saying.
“I suspected that James hit Timothy which caused him to have black eye, I just want to go and see him…his place is far from here, let me rush down and see him…I will come back after seeing him, please take my things to the house…I will meet you up.
Michelle quickly left, she went to see Tim.
When she got to Tim’s places, he was surprised because he was not expecting her.
Michelle saw his blood shot eye, he asked him what happened after they entered inside.
“You made your husband more furious when you pecked me. seeing you in my arms was enough offence already until you pecked my cheek before leaving…he thought I was having something with you and got angry… Michelle, I really do not want you to be giving him reasons to grieve…he is a wounded man and a jealous type…I don’t really blame him for my black eye. if I wanted to get back at him I have many ways, I could have come down from the car and retaliate but I’m not that kind of person Mich and I’m sorry things are really going this way with you and him. this is the second time James will be acting cold towards me, the first was at the hospital, he rejected my hand shake and walked out on me, then the second is getting a serious punch from him as if I wrecked his family… that guy doesn’t really worth it .. maybe everything happening is all for the best…
“I thought you were siding him before… now look at what he did to you… I’m tired Tim, let me just go… I’m glad is not as worst as I thought…I will see you tomorrow, is already getting dark and I told Katie that I won’t stay for long…
Michelle stood up to leave.
Tim also stood after telling her he would have loved to go and drop her but he can’t drive due to his eyes.
Michelle told him not to worry she will take the public bus the same way she came.
When they got to the door Tim turned to Michelle and said.
“Mich, please stay here tonight…is already late out there… I’m worried about you jumping from one bus to the other… please, you can use the spare room and as for cloths you can wear mine to sleep tonight then when you get back to Katie you change to something better for work…
Michelle later agreed to stay as Timothy showed her the spare room where she can sleep after refreshing.
The next day James drove down to Michelle’s office but she was not at work and also Timothy.
James searched for Katie’s number but couldn’t find it so he drove down to where she works.
Katie was frowning at his sight.
James greeted her warmly, he apologized to her for angrily asking her out of his house long time ago, he pleaded to see Michelle.
Katie told him that Michelle was over at Timothy’s place, she was there to check up on Timothy after he sustained a black eye from him.
James heart began to beat fast, he tried to sound calm and control his boiling emotions.
James asked Katie to kindly give him Timothy’s house address so that he can drive down and also apologise.
Katie later gave him after his long persistent.
James drove off to Timothy’s house.
To be continued…
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