Wingless and beautiful episode 17
đWINGLESS AND BEUTIFULđ
đEPISODE SEVENTEENđ
*HUNTER POV*
It hadnât been fair that Allison and I lost so much of thetime we could have been together. We could have beenhappy since the day I returned from my surgery. Butinstead, I spent a great deal of time nursing my brokenheart because I thought she had moved on without me. Ithought she didnât keep her promise to wait for me.
But we were both victims of Andersonâs lie andtreachery. He was so desperate to have her, he resorted tostupid methods to get her attention.
I remembered when I was trapped in the cabin withAllison, I was still so angry⌠at her⌠at Anderson⌠at theworld. I was harboring all these ill feelings because Icouldnât accept the fact that I went through all the trouble ofa corneal transplant for her, only to find that she was
already dating somebody else.But in spite of my anger, I wasnât able to stop myselffrom k-ssing her, holding her in my arms. I knew I may onlyhave that one chance, and I didnât care if she belonged to
Anderson. I saw an opening⌠a shadow of a chance⌠Igrabbed it!But then, she mentioned something that didnât seem toadd up. She said that Anderson saved her from thepotheads one night she was headed home and that was whyshe felt so indebted to him, she couldnât bear to hurt hisfeelings.
How many pothead assaults could she have had?
Because I remember doing exactly what she said Anderson did for her! I saved her one night. I risked my life and wouldhave gladly given it, if it meant saving hers.She sounded so convincedâwithout a doubtâthat itwas Anderson who fought off those guys to protect her.I didnât say anything even though I wanted to take herback immediately during that day at the lake house. Ineeded to be sure first. But it took all my self-control not topunch Andersonâs teeth down his throat and cripple him,because I suspected he had been lying all along.
For days, I drove around the area where Allison wasattacked, hoping to find those guys again. And yesterday, inan abandoned alley, I found them, drinking and getting highin broad daylight.
âWho are you?â one of them asked when I approachedthem.
âIf you know whatâs good for you, you would stay thef-ck away from us,â the other added.
âIâm not here for trouble,â I said. âI just want to ask yousomething.â
They looked at me from head to feet and then one ofthem said, âAsk and then leave!â
I took my phone from my pocket and scanned mygallery for a clear picture of Anderson.
âDo you know this guy?â
They both looked at the screen and stared at Andersonâsphoto for a long while. I watched their expressions for anysign of recognition.
âWaitâŚâ one of them said. He stared at Andersonâsphoto intently and then his expression changed as ifsomething clicked in,side his brain. âWasnât this the guy whopaid us a hundred bucks to deliberately attack a girl so hecould swoop in and pretend to rescue her?â
The other looked at the screen again and then henodded. âOh, yeah. Rich kid. Handsome. But didnât knowhow to ask a girl out properly.â
âSeriously?â I asked, hĂŚrdly believing my ears.
âYes. What a wimp!â They both laughed.
âLike who does that, right?â one of the guys said in amocking tone.
âHow much did he pay you again?â
âFifty each,â one of the guys replied. âAre you here toask us of the same thing?â
âOf course not,â I smirked. âThank you for theinformation, though.â I placed two one hundred-dollar billson top of their table. âFor answering my questions.â
I walked away from there, seething with anger. I hunteddown Anderson. I couldnât wait to beat him black and bluefor the trouble, danger and fear he put Allison through.I waited for him in school but he was a no-show. I wentto his house, but it didnât even look like anybody was home.I would have waited for him longer but I had to be outsidethe bookshop at nine. I was waiting for her every night,making sure that she had a safe ride homeâeven when shewas with Anderson. I always waited outside the bookshop atclosing time, like it had been part of my daily routine.Since we got back from the lake house, her aunt hadbeen picking her up. I followed them home, ensuring thatboth of them got home safely.
Finally, this afternoon, I found Anderson dining alone atBurger Inn. He didnât go to school again.I stood in front of his table, staring at him. Wrath waswritten all over my forehead in bold letters.He looked up from his food and stared back at meevenly. He let go of the burger in his hands and then heshook his head. He didnât ask me anything, as if he alreadyknew⌠this confrontation was long overdue.
âHow do you want to do this? Here or outside?â Igrowled.
He looked around. The restaurant was almost empty,save for a few older people dining and chatting overnewspaper and coffee.
He stood up from his seat. Then he replied, âOutside,Vaughn.â
I followed him, bawling my fists to control myself fromdragging him out by the collar.We stood in the almost des**ted parking lot.
Finally, he turned to face me. He took a deep breath andsaid, âI have something that belongs to you.â
âIf youâre talking about my girlfriend, I demand that youreturn her at once!â I fumed.
âLook, Vaughn, I didnât know she was your girlfriend. Ididnât even know you knew each other until I read herdiary.â
I narrowed my eyes at him. âWhat diary?â
âShe keeps a diary⌠a collection of letters she wrote foryou,â he replied. âI⌠I have it.â
âWhy would she give you that diary if it was meant forme?â
He shook his head. âShe didnât. I⌠I took it from her bagthat night you were trapped in the cabin.â
Bam! I punched him on the jaw as hĂŚrd as I could.
âThatâs for stealing from her!â I bellowed.
Bam!âThatâs for trying to steal her from me!â
Bam! Bam! Bam!
âAnd those⌠those are for paying those low-lives toassault her so you could fake-save her!â I shouted angrily.
âDo you have any idea of the danger you put her through?!â
âI know, I know!â He spat blood on the ground. He heldhis jaw in pain. He didnât even try to fight back. âIâm sorry! Ididnât know it would go that far.â
Bam!
âHow selfish and stupid are you?â I growled. âWhy thef-ck would you do that?
âBecause I love her! I couldnât get through to her. Shehad been so⌠so evasive. She wouldnât accept anything from me⌠no matter what I do!â
âI love her too. More than you could ever love her, butdid you see me endangering her life?â
âI know! And I said Iâm sorry!â
Bam!
He fell down on the ground.âStand up, Anderson! Fight back!â I demanded. âLetâssettle this now! Man to man! Fight me!â
He held a hand up in front of me. He furiously shook hishead. âNo, no. no!â
âStand up!â
âF-ck it, Vaughn! I donât want to fight you! Even if Iwanted to, Iâve seen how you kicked those potheadsâ asses.I know you have a freaking black belt in martial arts. Iâm notstupid!â he said, almost in a scre-m while he staggered tohis feet. âI know what I did. And when I read your diary, Irealized how much she loved you. I know now why nomatter how hĂŚrd I tried, no matter what I do⌠I could never
steal her away from you. You can beat me up all you want. Itwouldnât make a difference.â
He sounded desperate. I might even say that he wasabout to cry. But he was right. Even if I beat him to the pulp,it wouldnât change the things that happened in the pastmonths. It wouldnât bring back the time I lost with Allison.
âWhereâs the diary?â
âI returned it to her,â he replied.
âAs in you hand-delivered it to her?â I asked,suspiciously. I couldnât trust a word that came out of thissc-mbagâs mouth.
He shook his head. âI went to⌠CRC. I left the diarythere and then I left a message on her locker to tell herwhere to find it.â
âWhere in CRC did you leave it?â
He gave me a hĂŚrd look, then he replied, âIn⌠in yourgarden.â
Bam!
He almost lost his balance with that punch. âWhat thef-ck was that for?â
âFor going to our garden!â I spat back at him. âYoudesecrated it, just by stepping foot on it, you filthysc-mbag!â
âIâm sorry, okay? I was gonna tell you, too. So you couldgo there and finally tell her the truth.â
âSay what? You want me to tell her what you did?â
He bit his lip, refusing to answer.
âYou son of aâŚâ I aimed for him again, but he shieldedhis face with his arms.
âStop it, you freaking war freak!â he scre-med. âI will doit! I will do it!â
âYou will do what exactly?â
âI will be the one to tell her, okay? Happy now?â
I shook my head. âYou will not get away with this soeasily. She deserved to know the truthâstraight from yourfilthy mouth!â
He took a deep breath. âBut Iâm leaving for Germanytonight.â
âIâm sure you would be able to find the time!â I snarledat him one last time and then I turned to leave.
I went straight to CRC. I didnât know how Andersonwould tell Allison about what he did. If he wouldnât, then Iwould. I just wanted to get to the diary first, beforesomebody stumbled upon it and it got lost to us forever.Memories came flooding back to me as I walked thepath towards our garden. For some moments, I closed myeyes and remembered the hundreds of times I walked it withthe aid of nothing but a walking stick.I came back to this place only once since my transplant.After that, I couldnât come back here anymore. There were
far too many memories of Allison in this place. And it killedme every time to think that she was with somebody else.I was relieved when I found a brown leather-coverednotebook safely sitting on top of the table. I opened it, my hands slightly shaking.
I read the title on the first page, âLetters to Hunter.âI remembered before I left, I asked her to write a diaryfor me so I could read it when I return.I felt like my heart just broke in,side my ribcage.She had kept her promise.I took the diary and climbed up on the bench to sit on
top of the table, facing the lake.I flipped through the pages and started reading thewords that she wrote for me.
Dear HunterâŚ
I donât know how long I sat there, reading every word.She wrote me almost every day, telling me everything thathappened to her since I left.
Dear Hunter,
Today, we needed to move houses. Meredith could nolonger afford this house. I totally understand that. Mymother didnât exactly leave her with a huge inheritance. Iwas just worried about how you would find me. I didnât knowhow to reach you so I could give you my new address. But Iknow⌠you would find me. No matter what. We would findeach other…
Dear Hunter,
I was temping at Strung. I love working there. Dominic,the guy I work with, is on the local band. He told me I wouldmake good money playing on gigs. But unfortunately,Meredith doesnât agree with that. Plus, the gigs are mostlydone at nights, and it wouldnât be safe for me to come homeafter midnight. I think she was right. So for now, my bestencounter with a guitar and other musical instruments
would be when I dust the products on sale at StrungâŚ
Dear Hunter,
⌠You see, Chaise was the guy who saved me the othernight. He had been following me home⌠making sure I wassafe each night after I go to work. Then when my luck struckout, he was there to rescue me⌠like a guardian angel, Godsent to make sure I wouldnât have new nightmares toescape from.He told me he liked me. But hey! Look up! I already toldhim we could only be friends. I still canât date anybody.
I sort of told this perfect guy I would wait for him tocome back. And Iâm still waiting. I still believe that oneday⌠I would see him again⌠touch him⌠k-ss him⌠hearhim say the words he should have said to me before heleft⌠so I could say those words back to him.Come back to me, Hunter. Itâs still you. It will always beyou.
I didnât know it, but tears were rolling down my cheeks. Ispent months being angry at her because I thought shedidnât wait long enough for me to return. I thought sheâdgiven up on us. I thought she didnât believe I would keep mypromises of coming back and protect her, take care of her.From the pages I read, I could tell that life had not beenso easy on her. But her letters had always been optimisticand she always ended them with a note saying she couldnâtwait for me to come back to her.I could only imagine the pain that she went throughwhen after all the waiting, hoping and praying for my safety,
I came back ignoring her, to the point that made her unsurethat I remembered her at all.What an assh-le I had truly been!
I promised not to hurt her. I went through a transplantbecause I wanted to protect her. I asked her to promise towait for me. And what did I do as soon as I came back? Ipretended she didnât exist. I stood by and watched hersurvive every single day, instead of making things easy forher.But even if I didnât do anything, she made me so proud.She was so brave, so tough. No matter how many stones
they threw at her, she dodged all of them and she alwaysemerged triumphant.Every day, I wanted to hug her, tell her how proud I was
of her. But every day, it killed me to think that she was withAnderson and I was hopeless to get her back. And worse,back then, I couldnât even blame her for being with anotherguy. It was I who left her behind.When my old schoolmates came, things became evenmore complicated for me. I didnât expect Tania to show upwith them. And everybody thought we were an item, whenwe were no more than childhood acquaintances. Ourparents were business partners and they were hoping tomerge our families by marrying me off to her. Tania hadalways been in on the program. I had never been.Sure, she was pretty. But she had never been my type.We were never interested in the same things when we werekids. How much more now? Even before my accident, wehad grown so far apart, she almost felt like a stranger. WhenI lost my mother, she never even offered her condolences tome in person, even though she was my oldest friend. Whenshe found out that I would be blind forever, I just neverheard from her again. Thatâs why when she came for the
immersion program, and started following me around, I had
to hold on to the last strings of chivalry in my body so I wouldnât reject her in the most humiliating way possible.
Perhaps even Allison thought I was with Tania. I didnâtcare what others thought. But I didnât want Allison to thinkthere was a girl from my past I didnât tell her about.I remember that day at the beach, when Allison brokeher slippers. I had been doing so well in pretending not toknow her or care about her. But as I watched herdesperately trying to salvage her slipper, I thought tomyself, F-ck it! I wouldnât stand there and watch her suffer.So, I finally worked up the courage to speak to her.I remember her saying, âCan you just go attend to your
girlfriend? See if she needs help with anything!âI couldnât help the smile on my face when I told her, âAsyou wish.â And then I scooped her up in my arms.When she asked me what the hell I was doing, I foughtto urge to reply with âDoing what you asked. Attending to
the needs of my girlfriend.â Because God knows, she is mygirlfriend. In my heart, she was. She will always be.People were looking at us, as I carried her in my arms.She thought I would be embarrassed when the people fromschool saw me with her. If she only knew I was practically inheaven that time. I wanted everybody to see her with me,like Don Winston⌠and most especially Anderson!
At the shop, when she told me her shoe size, I chose themost expensive pair of slippers on the store. Not because Iwas expecting her to pay me back. But because since I mether, I wanted to spoil her. I planned to give her the world.Whatâs a pair of designer slippers compared to that?During that night at the concert, I was in the worst
mood because I could barely hold all the bottled upemotions in,side me. I felt so trapped, so desperate.I went to the concert because I knew she would bethere. And it had been my habit to keep an eye on her,especially on times when I knew she would be out late.I couldnât find her in the concert grounds and I thoughtshe would be somewhere with Denise, since she had beenhelping her out. But when she showed up on that stage,looking as beautiful as ever, I almost lost it, I felt like I wason the verge of breaking down.
When she played the song I taught her, I couldnât bemore proud. She played it flawlesslyâas perfect as she was.And I would have given everything to be up there with her.She received an encore for her performance. And shedeserved every bit of that. But when Anderson appeared onthe stage to give her a rose, I couldnât take it anymore. I hadto get out of there.Unfortunately, Tania caught up with me.
âWhy are you in a foul mood, Hunter?â she kept goadingme. âItâs that girl, isnât it?âI kept quiet and headed towards the parking lot.
âTell me!â she shouted. âI heard the rumors. People toldme they saw you carrying that scar-faced girl in your arms!Is it true! Is it her? That scar-facedâŚâ
I turned towards her, and I knew she saw the furiousâŹĂpression on my face. âYou call her scar-faced again and Iswear Tania! I will forget I was raised to be a gentleman!â
She stared back at me, quite dumbfounded. I knew thatthe only thing worse than the ice-cold fury in my voice wasthe explosive wrath on my face. It must have scared her.But she didnât back down.
âItâs true, then? It was that girl!â
âYes! It was her!â I closed my eyes and stared up at thestar-freckled sky. I heaved a sigh. âIt will always be her.â
âWhy? What did you see in her? She was nothing likeme! She was nothing like what your father would expect youto bring home to your family.â
I raised a haughty brow at her. âExactly. She wasnothing like you,â I told her truthfully.
I had no choice. I had to be honest, even if it breaksTaniaâs heart. Maybe itâs for the best. So she would stophoping there will ever be a future for us.
âShe has a boyfriend!â
I shrugged. âYes, she does. Me.â
âWhat?â
âWe met at the center where I lived when I was blind.We fell in love. She was the reason why I agreed to undergothis transplant.â
âOh, now, I get it! You fell in love with her when youwere blind. And you didnât see what she looked like.â
âYes!â I replied without even blinking. âAnd now that Icould finally see, I thought she looked even more beautifulthan how I imagined she would be when I was blind.âAt that moment, Allison walked in front of us, withAnderson and Denise. I stared back at them, resisting the
urge to hit Anderson black and blue. But I doubted thatwould help me score points with Allison.
âOur fathers are expecting us to get married,â Taniasaid. I could hear the desperation in her voice.
âI guess they will be disappointed,â I murmured.
âDonât tell me, you intended to marry her instead? Noway, you would know she was the one!â
I stared at her for a moment. Then I nodded. I held thependant of my necklace in my hand. âI already bought aring.â
âGod damn it, Hunter!â she shouted at me âWhy?!â
âYou know why!â I bit back at her. And in a calmer voice,
I whispered. âI never told you I loved you. Because I neverdid. You were nothing more than an acquaintance. But herâŚI love her, Tania. The way I have never loved anybodybefore. Iâm sorry.â
Tears welled up in her eyes. âI swear, I will tell yourfather about this!â
I shook my head. âI donât care. Knock yourself out.â
Then I turned to walk away, leaving Tania with the rest ofher friends.
I sighed at the memory of that night. Tania didnât evencomplete the immersion program. She went home earlierthan the others. And true to her word, she told my father.My father immediately called me the next day. I wasprepared for his long monologue. There was nothing hecould say that would make me change my mind. I would justsit there and pretend I was even listening. Garbage in,garbage out. It was like he never even called.
But what he asked actually surprised me.
âIs this the girl that you requested your uncle to buy anecklace for? The necklace with braille at the back.â
âHow did you find out about that necklace?â I asked himback.
âBecause I was the one who bought it, son,â he replied.
âAnd I know, whoever that girl was, she must be special. So wonderful, she gave me a chance to have my son back.â
âSo⌠youâre not going to talk me out of not marryingTania?â
âYouâre an adult now, Hunter,â my father said gently.
âYouâre very smart⌠sometimes, too smart. And you haveall your motherâs money and properties. You are rich enoughon your ownâŚ
âYouâve lost a lot in that accident. This is your second life. I want you to do whatever it is that would make youhappy. I have hurt you so much in the past. I have taken somuch from you. The choice of who to love and who to spendthe rest of your life with is a choice I will never take awayfrom you. I love you, son.â
That was something I never expected from him at all.And even though the wounds still hadnât healed completely,I was glad we had that conversation.I donât know how long I sat there in the garden, readingthe pages of Allisonâs diary. I was on the last entry shewrote. It was the night of the concert when I hit a tree in theparking lot after seeing her perform on stage, after seeingher carrying a rose from Anderson, after my conversationwith Tania. I was trying to channel the pain I felt somewhereelse because I thought I could no longer endure it, live withit.
Dear Hunter,
If I could shout at you now, I would.
If I could hit you over and over so you would feel thesame pain I feel right now, I would.
If I could show you how angry and hurt I am, I would.
But I couldnâtâŚ
I couldnâtâŚ
I couldnâtâŚ
The boy I used to know has gone to a place I couldnâtreach him. And I was reduced to a memory he would rather forget.
Before we come to an end, I wish I could shout at you,hit you, show you how mad I am right now. Even if I could, Idonât think you would hear⌠or feel⌠or see.
A tear rolled down my cheek again when I read thewords she wrote. I wasnât the only one hurting. She washurting too. And it wasnât fair that she thought she meantnothing to me. She was everything to me. She was my love.She was my life. My past. My present and my future.Oh no, angel. You didnât have to hit me or shout at meat all.
Because I hearâŚ
I feelâŚ
I see.
Suddenly, I heard footsteps approach until it stopped afew feet behind me. The air felt charged and a familiarfeeling crept through me. I felt exactly the way I didwhenever she would come and find me in this gardenbefore. And I knew⌠this was my chance to make
everything right.I closed the diary in my hand and climbed down from
the table I was sitting on. Slowly, I turned around to face her. She was looking at me with a wildly confusedexpression. Slowly, I removed the hood that concealed myface.
I stared at her beautiful face for a long while. I watchedas realization crossed her face and then tears began to wellup in her eyes.
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