Agony of the deaf episode 21
AGONY OF THE DEAF
(Faded Feelings)
Episode 21
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Written by Author Nath
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There comes a time when you look into the mirror and you realize that what you see is all that you will ever be. And then you accept it. Or you kill yourself. Or you stop looking in the mirrors. Eniola was yet to understand the part of the acceptance, but had a clear comprehension of the part of suicide. She ran to the top of an uncompleted five storey building and stood at the edge to end her life from there. The evening wind kept blowing her gown backward as her eyes never dried from her tears.
None would understand her pain neither would any understand her agony nor the depression that encourages suicidal action. No one can fathom a psychotically depressed victim:
The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of hopelessness or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And also, surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise building. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the falling view. But in the end one needs more courage to live than to kill himself.
Nevertheless, people had gathered at the base of the storey building, chattering and pointing terrifying fingers at Eniola. Meanwhile, Gbenga had managed to climb to the top of the building, standing a few meters from Eniola.
“Eniola, please, you don’t have to take your life. Do you really want to die?” he asked, pleadingly.
“I am a misfortune to life, papa.” She began. “I can’t eat and I can’t sleep. I’m not doing well in terms of being a functional human.”
“Eni, think positively. It may be the way it looks but not the way it is. If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for something. Tough times do not last, but tough people do. All things are difficult before they are easy. The gem cannot be polished without friction, and a person cannot be perfected without trials.” the old man took a step forward.
“No one commits suicide because they want to die, papa.” Eniola crying voice trailed pitifully in Gbenga’s ears.
“Then why do they do it?” he asked her.
“Because they want to stop the pain.”
Gbenga shook his head. “Listen my daughter, The difficulties and struggles of today are but the price we must pay for the accomplishments and victories of tomorrow. If it does not challenge you, it will not change you. No matter how challenging the economy of the jungle is, the lion will never eat grass. Nothing good comes easy in this world. If things get easier, then maybe you are heading downhill.”
“No, papa.” Eniola objected. “The love that exists between Claude and I cannot be termed good. It brings nothing but suffering and agony.”
“A real love suffers agony just like the devil is looking for the righteous to give a ticket to hell. When heartbreak arises, when suffering and obstacles hit your way, when you think life isn’t fair for you, do not relent on your struggle for a better life. When vultures surround you, try not to die. What doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger. Remember, to get lost is to learn the way.” Gbenga exhaled.
“I’m sorry, papa” Eniola took a step to jump. People on the ground creamed!! Just then, Ayomide the mother arrived, crying and shouting at the base of the building. “I’m sorry, mother.” she added before wanting to jump.
“No, no, no, Eniola, wait!” Gbenga shrieked. “I’ve exhausted all the proverbs in my mind. You need to rethink your decision. Do you want to leave your mother heartbroken? Please, my child. The fact that the child got drowned in water does not mean you should not drink water again. Oh, thank God this one just popped out of my mouth. Just think about it! Strength is not about how much you can handle before you break but how much you can endure after breaking. A character cannot be developed in ease and quiet, but only through the experience of trial and suffering that it is strengthened. You are the strongest woman I have ever known.”
“Papa, my life is meaningless!!” Eniola shouted in pains.
“Life has meaning only in the struggle. Triumph or defeat is in the hands of the gods!!” Gbenga raised his voice too.
“The gods have failed me!!”
“Failure is the mother of success! Please, come to me my child.” Gbenga finally drew closer and gradually held her by the hand. The poor girl fell on his arms crying bitterly.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, papa. I didn’t know what I was doing. I don’t know what is wrong with my life. Please, for give me.” she cried.
Her tears and agony touched the old man. Therefore he felt a tear, dropping from one of his eyes. “None of this is your fault, child.” He bagan to dry her tears. Just then, the mother arrived and embraced her.
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At night, she sat on the edge of her bed with two papers in her hands. The first paper was the promise she made to Claude. She glanced at it to rephrase it in her mind: “I promise to be on your team. I promise to be faithful. I promise to be quick to forgive. I promise to always surprise you. I promise to stand by you. I promise to trust you, respect you, follow you, honor you and support you. I promise to love you, always.”
The second paper was the one given to her mother by Charlotte through Guillaume. She read it in her mind thus: “I don’t know what binds you and my son together. All I know is that both of you really love each other. Be his mother when I’m no more, do not let my death be in vain. Even in the grave, I give my blessings to both of you.” she dropped the papers on the bed.
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Charlotte’s burial was the next day. All gathered around the grave where the final prayer was going on. Ayomide and Gbenga with Eniola by his side were among the crowd. Even Chloe and Adewoyin and some elders of the village were also present. Eniola occasionally glanced at Claude from her position which the young boy sometimes caught, but didn’t care. She was totally a strange person to him.
Nevertheless, all gathered in the royal house after the burial. Guillaume sat beside Claude followed by Chloe, Adewoyin and Nnanna. Opposite them were Gbenga, Isiala, Ayomide, Eniola and two more elders. Gbenga cleared his throat and began. “Claude, we thank God your mother has been laid to rest. And we must finalize issues here. Is not that we are begging you to marry our daughter or to have anything to do with her, is because of the tragedy caused by the love both of you shared. Two lives I know have been taken because of it. You went to the city and came back, denying ever knowing who she is. May be you’ve seen a flower more beautiful than the one you have. So we ask you, why did you change your mind?”
“Change my mind on what?” Claude asked aggressively. “I said I do not know this girl. I’ve never seen her before.”
Hearing that, Nnanna and Chloe looked at him.
“You don’t remember seeing her in the farm where both of you met?” Ayomide asked him. “You don’t remember living with us in the house?” she added.
“I said I don’t! You people should leave now!”
“You’re chasing us out of our own land?” Isiala surprisingly looked at his fellow elders.
“I think you all should obey and let him be for now.” Nnanna interfered again.
“This boy again?!” Isiala pointed his staff at him. “Is it because you’re allowed to be here? The little opportunity given to a monkey to wear clothes does not guarantee it to join the dining table. Be warned!!” he shouted at him.
Gbenga stood up. “Claude, remember today. You reconciled with our daughter when you thought you’d lost her. You’re losing her again. He is a fool whose sheep runs away twice. We may seem little to you but we are not little. When God cooks, you don’t see smoke. Do not mistake a short man for a boy. Rain beats the leopard’s skin, but it does not wash out the s₱0ts. We will remember today. When the chick ignores its mother’s warning, the eagle grasps it for a meal.”
Isiala also stood up. “We should be going, Gbenga. You cannot convince a monkey that honey is sweeter than a banana. Only a fool tests the depth of the river with both feet.” He led the way followed by others. Eniola and Claude looked at each other before she finally followed her mother out of the house. Only Gbenga remained. Just at the door, he turned to Claude saying, “I should have known. No matter how blunt a knife maybe, it should never be given to a fool. Mind you, a man who hangs around a beautiful girl without saying a word ends up fetching water at her wedding.” he concluded and left…..
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TO BE CONTINUED