It Should Have Been Like This

It should have been like this episode 20

🤩 Kemmy B. Gabriel Present Another rom-nce Novel: 🤩

💔 It Should Have Been Like This 💔

👩‍💻 Book Twenty: worthiness 👩‍💻

💜 Lavender’s viewpoint 💜

Apollo Dean Stine, the man who believed he was a blessing to both men and women. He was never a proud man, never one to boast because his actions spoke louder than words. Before, he was hot as hell. Now he was hot as an angel. He was everything a woman would beg for, everything a g-y man would love, yet, he had only eyes on nothing but the game of s€×. He was a fool, a complete lunatic from my view, but A-okay. The man knew how to get what he wants whenever he wants it, and the one thing he loves most is annoying Rominic.

Rominic and Apollo had a long history involving Apollo following him around just to make him miserable. Don’t get it wrong. Even if Rominic hates his guts, he found it hilarious. He would do anything to annoy Nic and he succeeded by stealing all of his girlfriends. He tried me when we met, but then, I was blinded by Rominic. Rominic was all I saw and wanted, all I needed. But now, the man he called a thief was about to steal me. Verbally.

I knew he was the perfect guy for the plan. So there I was in my personal bedroom with my lady friends, except Veralina and Rylee. They both had something important to do so the others were there to help me find a nice dress for the date and spend some quality time with each other.

“I still don’t agree with this, sister tits of mine,” Anna protested for the umpteenth time. They all didn’t like the idea but understood where I was coming from. All except Anna and Tyra who thought I was just wasting time. Their believe is ‘f-ck and make up’. That’ll explain why she forgave Link after humping him.

“Yeah, just f-ck the man and get this over with. You don’t see me fighting with Link, do you? I mean, what’s the point? He’s the father of my child and the only man I’ve ever truly love so why pretend? He made a mistake, yeah, get it. But that doesn’t mean I’ll put myself through such torture and go on fake dates.” Tyra added with a dramatic wave of her hand.

“Why on Earth would you go on a date with him, Apollo Stine? He’s like the supreme god of s€× and super swoon orgasm. I’m telling you, hon, there is no way you will date that guy and not want to c-m on his face. He’s like s€× magnet.” They all nodded to Ginger’s comment.

“It’s true. I’ve f-cked the guy and till today, no one have made me c-m as much as he did. I’m not saying s€× with Cameron is bad, it’s mind-blowing, but compared to Apollo’s, it’s a little bit low. Now if I was a s€× obsess freak and isn’t madly in love with my husband, I would have found a lot of opportunities to jump that walking personification of godly s€×. It’s like f-cking Apollo himself which is funny because Apollo is the god of the sun and handsomeness? I can’t remember. Either way, his d*ck totally drives you to Olympics and back. He is that good.” Sussy rambled. I gave them all confusing looks. Anna looked away with a tight press of her l-ips while Ginger blushed profusely. The only person not shying away from me was Terra, which means…

“No way! You all did not,” I gasped, “when?”

“Yeah, it was one time when I went to Australia to meet this producer for a script. We met at a bar and he came along with Apollo, as one of the sponsors. Blah, blah, we somehow ended up in his car and you know,” she rolled her eyes embarrassedly, chewing on her bottom lip. Of course she knew I knew she cheated on Ferris, my beloved best of the best of friends.

Ferris was a good man and would never cheat on her, someone he loved. I also knew from my experience that Apollo wasn’t the easiest man to resist and loved chasing women he ought not to, especially if they are blond in anyway. In case you don’t remember, Annalise is blonde and smoking hot. I wanted to be angry and scre-m at her, but I knew there was no point and it was better left that way.

“How long ago?” I sighed.

“Five, I’m sorry.” I waved dismissively. I didn’t even have the mental strength to yell.

“Wait, no scre-ming and defending of Ferris’ fidelity?” Ginger asked with a c*ck of her dark ginger brow and a awestruck glint in her reddish brown eyes. I shrugged. Her salmon pink l-ips curved into a sneer. “Seriously, no arguments?”

“What do you want me to say? It’s been five years and if I know Annalise well, she probably blunted it out to him within a week after it happened. If they are still together now, why should I care?” I quirked a brow at Anna, throwing the question at her.

“Ferris and I had a pretty bad fall out then, and if it’ll make you feel any better, we both cheated on each other during the separation,” she s-cked her bottom lip sheepishly, “though his was a drunken mistake and I blame the bitch that took advantage of him. The point is that Apollo sed-ced me, case close.” I turned my interrogative gaze to Ginger. She let out a small whimper before sinking into the sofa she sat on.

“In my defense, I slept with him before I married Elias so that was a long time ago.”

“I’m an opera singer, I meet and f-ck a lot of people, sue me,” Sussy shrugged, “but that was before I married Cameron,” she rolled a lock of her ginger brown hair around her index finger and puckered up like a high school girl trying to flirt. “He was worth every minute of it.”

“I only got a boyfriend last week so whatever,” Tyra said with a shrug. Now I suddenly don’t like Apollo anymore. To hell with his good looks and killer abs, Nic is better. It reminded me of the time I first met him. I was awed by the power he had in women, but wasn’t interested in him. I saw him for what he was: a womanizer and a girlfriend stealer. He had records for breaking relationsh¡ps, and he didn’t bat an eyelid over it. I never truly appreciated men like that and so I thought Rominic was perfect.

He had as much money as Apollo, more powers and connections and yet he was never seen with any woman other than Peyton, his “best friend” and someone he took as a “younger sister”. I thought he was genuinely a good guy like he said… Okay, he is. Rominic wasn’t the type to move about with different women because he wasn’t raised to, but he did cheat on me with Peyton. But if you look at it from the right angle, he cheated on Peyton with me. I was always the other woman, never the first but the difference is that the first woman knew about me, but I didn’t.

“Lavender!” I blinked out of my thought and looked at Tyra who was looking at me with concern. “Are you okay? You just angrily broke your phone.”

“I did?” I asked puzzledly, turning my phone to look at it. There was three huge cracks along the screen, “oh, guess I squeezed too hærd. I’m fine, just remembered something.”

“Peyton?” Anna asked with a knowing look. I nodded with a sad sigh. I lowered my head, pressing my elbows to my knees and parting my legs. My eyes stayed strained on my bare feet as I fought back the tears. This was the reason I needed to do what I have to do. If I didn’t, I would never truly let go of the past.

What Rominic did wasn’t something I could forget in a hurry. I could never stop picturing all the times he would be in bed with Peyton, talking about me, about my stupidity and telling her the exact words he told me. They claimed he loved me, and even if I was seeing it, I still couldn’t believe it. Deep down I knew they were right, but with the memories of them together plaguing my mind, it was impossible to believe. Tossing away all the doubts wasn’t easy and I knew being with someone else and watching him pine would do me good. And somewhere deep down, I knew I was also trying to prove I was better than Peyton, that I could attract men better than her.

Peyton was never a competition for me, at least to me she was never because she was the sister I loved. I cared about her too much to see her as a competition but the moment I knew she was, I realized she had every right to win. What was I thinking when I thought he’d find me attractive? Peyton is gorgeous, even more than Annalise and Sussy, and that is saying something. She was everything a story book main character would be, the perfect woman the male lead would fall for. But I wasn’t. I was always the not so much of a good one, the backup in a story. Plain as Jane, that’s what I was. So I guess I just wanted him to try everything to get me. The sick part of my mind wanted him to beg and feel the pain of imagining another man f-cking the woman he loves.

“My p*ssy,” she pulled my hands away from my face. My palms were covered with tears but it didn’t matter to her. “Stop doing this to yourself, p*ssy, please. You are not plain, you are not worthless or not good enough him. It is Rominic who isn’t good enough for you, who has never been good enough for you. Stop comparing yourself to that bitch, you are way better…”

“How?” I sobbed, “how am I good enough when the wh0le time it was never about me. I was nothing to him, I was nothing but…”

“Yes, he did come to you to deceive you and claim your father’s property, and your mother’s for the harlot…”

“Exactly! He did it all for her! He would never do…”

“Lavender, listen!” She scre-med, slapping her hands on my w-t cheeks, the impact making a clomping sound. She pulled my head closer so she could scre-m the words directly into my face. “You are not worthless! You are not plain and you are better than Peyton! Wanna know why? Rominic was in love and obsess with her, he could do anything for her. But when he met you, he discovered that what he had with her was one-sided. In their relationsh¡p, he was always giving and never taking, always bearing her bullshit and nonsense and ridiculous demands. He realized that what they had was no way close to love but infuriation and obsession. With you, it was both give and take, a balance relationsh¡p… Right, Tyra?” Anna asked, looking at Tyra for confirmation of her theory. Tyra nodded.

“Rominic fell in love with you for real because you showed him what true love feels like. You gave him happiness, joy, sincerity… Unlike Peyton, you helped him with his ideas, encouraged his dreams and ambitions, added more to it and was his personal cheerleader. He found a best friend and wife in you; an angel and love in your soul, one that Peyton never gave. You were the perfect woman for him. You cooked, you cleaned, you never complained and nagged like Peyton did and you were a working woman. Peyton was a leech who depended on her mother and men for money, you depended on yourself and would gladly give it all to save someone you love. Rominic saw that remarkable woman and fell in love with her. And yes, it took him too long to realize what he felt, but the moment be did, he has never let go of it for a day.”

“So you see?” Anna whispered, turning my face towards her once again, her hands still cupping my w-t cheeks. “You are an incredible woman, plain or no plain. And what’s so plain about you? You still don’t realize how gorgeous you look. Yes, you were just a slender lady but the one thing you had that even Rominic knew was your beauty. Lavender, you are every bit as beautiful as your mother and so much more. You are everything a man would want for a wife and Peyton is not. If she was so perfect, why did he fall in love with you after getting to know you? Why did he do all he did afterwards and now? I might not know a lot about him but I know my theory is right and you are more perfect than Peyton. All she had was her body, but you had beauty and your heart is purer than gold and more precious than diamonds.”

“Then why don’t I feel that way?” I cried, “why do I always see her when I look at myself in the mirror? She is always laughing at me. Am I a wh-re for wanting to make Rominic jealous? I feel like I am…”

“Peyton is the definition of a wh-re, not you. Have you forgotten that in the history of Apollo, you and Rylee are the only ones who have bluntly told him no? Aside from the l-sbians but hey, he got most of them laid too. If you can resist Rominic, then, sister, you are more than perfect and the day will come when you will finally see what we see.” I heard Tyra say.

“And come on, Purple! Have you seen yourself now? You are glamorously hot!” Terra exclaimed. “Parturition pulled a good number on you, sis.”

“I agree,” Ginger piped in, “when I first saw you, I was like…”

“Hot glorious damn!” Anna exclaimed, making me giggle. “Take a look at this,” she released my face and sent her hands down to my braless b-obs. “Feel this two mountains!” I swatted her hands away with a laugh. All of a sudden, two hands went around my body and squeezed my b-obs.

“Hey!”

“You’re right, it is soft.” Sussy said with a small laugh. She was the b-obs squeezer.

“You had manageable b-obs before, but now, you have b-obs,” Terra said, exaggerating the “b-obs”. “In the past, your ass was a boner-killer, but now it’s totally bonerific!” Terra said as she squeezed my ass. They were all suddenly touching me allover.

“And h¡ps, have you seen her h¡ps? And her laps?” Ginger asked as she squeezed my thighs, “Apollo is going to drool when he sees her, don’t you think, girls?”

“Totally!” They squealed. I laughed as I tried to get them off me. They refused to let go but touched me more.

“Please, get off me,” I laughed.

“Not until you finally realize that you are no longer slender Lavender, you are much more…”

“I am not.”

“Well, then, let’s make her see what we see!”

~~~

My nerves was killing me; I was in a real tizzy. The girls really transformed me and as much as I wanted to blame it on fashion or some magic charm, the lady I saw in the mirror was all me. It was me. Indeed, I finally saw the hot chick Mr. Miller was always trying to make me see.

Terra almost succeeded into turning me to her weird goggle glasses, too much eyelids glitter, blue l¡pstick self while Ginger tried to turn me to an apple. Thank goodness Tyra, Anna and Sussy saved me. Instead, they found one of the dresses I bought, the one Serenity picked at the mall. It was a tight black high-neck cutout dress with lace long sleeves. They went all out with he black makeup but I admit, what I saw in the mirror was a s€×y, intimidating, no nonsense lady. They paired the outfit with silver knee-high leather boots because Anna claimed boots completes s€×y. The silver matched the silver bracelets, silver rope chain belt and frame bag.

I just love frame bags. They can do no wrong to me.

The girls left first, before Rominic returned. I had to make sure he was home when I leave and that was the reason for my nervousness. I longer cared what Apollo would think of my outfit, just Nic. They said to be confident. I should not feel like I don’t deserve him because he is the one who doesn’t deserve me. I am the important one and he should be the one to beg after years of…

But Peyton would never stand at the staircase hiding. She is bold, and…

No! I won’t do that, I won’t.

I took in a very, very, very, deep breath, did the sign of the cross and then muttered a small prayer so I wouldn’t end up on the floor. I gathered every single last confident in me, pulled it together and took the life changing leap. The moment I stepped out with my bag hanging from my elbow with my phone in my hands, I could feel his eyes on me. It almost made me trip.

“Wow! Mom, what’s up?!” I halted and looked at Zyaire with a small smile. Zyaire sat on the floor with Perry between his laps and a board game in front of them. They were playing it. I probably should mention that Perry had been sick for weeks so he stayed with the vet until he recovered. Anyways, Zyaire was wearing his father favorite muscle shirt and I really wasn’t in the mood to ask why. “Where you off to looking like a cup of steamy black coffee?”

“Wait, what?” Sera asked puzzledly, pausing from brushing one of the tail of Serenity’s pigtails, while I laughed.

“Mommy, you’re wearing the dress I chose!” Serene squealed excitedly, “it looks good on you!” Sera hit her head with the brush to stop her from bouncing in her seat.

“Thank you, baby. I’m going to be late today, so, Sera and Zach, you better get your siblings to bed early. Rominic, can you make sure Serene don’t stand behind the door and wait for… Rominic?” If I was feeling nervous before and bad about my body, I changed my mind with the way he was gaping. Like, mouth wide open shameless gawking. I intentionally swayed my h¡ps and snap my fingers. “Rominic?”

“Daddy?” Zayne called, shaking his father. Sera and Serene giggled while Zach managed a smirk. “Daddy, stop catching flies with your mouth, it’s bad habit.”

“He’s definitely catching something,” Perry Smart Mouth said which made himself and the others laugh, expect confuse Zayne and gawking Rominic.

“Well, I’m off then. See ya, kids!” I waved them bye.

“Bye, mom!” I sashayed to the door counting the seconds it would take him to run after me and demand where I was going to dressed like that. The dress was the least of the s€×y outfits in my closet, but to him, it was a threat if he wasn’t there. I remembered he didn’t really mind if I dressed s€×y. He would always say they can see but never touch because I would always be his. But first, I had to go thru the survey to see if the place was not related to a club.

“Lavender!” I paused. Twenty seconds. That was faster than I thought. I whirled around to face him with my smile still on my face, begging God not to allow him see through my facade. He was quite good at reading my expression when I found it difficult to read his. The only way I knew how he felt when he didn’t want me to was through his behaviors, body language and gestures. And sometimes, I felt his emotions.

“Yeah?”

“First of all, wow,” he clapped his hands together and pressed his fingers on his l-ips, “but where are you going to?”

“I’m catching up with an old friend at a restaurant, not a club or a bar, a restaurant.”

“Male or female?” The big moment. My tongue twitched with the urge to lie, but I didn’t want to. This was it.

“Male.” I said with my breath stuck in my throat. I wanted to be satisfied with the jealousy that bloomed on his face but why then was I guilty?

“A friendly date, right?”

“No, Rominic, a date date…”

“W…”

“I really don’t have time for this, Rominic, and you will not throw a tantrum over me going out on a date with a guy. We are not a couple, we never were and would never be. Do me a favor and don’t go telling my kids about my dating another man because if they find out, I would never forgive you.” I said with my face mask with boredom and disinterest. I was waiting for the joy but I was getting nor. All I got when he opened his mouth and closed it helplessly was pain. Pain that he wasn’t the one I was going out with. Pain that he wasn’t really going to put up a show like I wanted him to. Pain that he really would give me up if I decide to leave.

So when he nodded and walked away without a word, my guilt and pain turned to anger. He could swallow his sadness and play it cool for as long as he wants, but I would break him. Rominic would explode with jealousy or my last name isn’t Amherst.

🧡 Rominic’s viewpoint 🧡

Pain comes in many ways but it comes for one reason and that is to drive away happiness and bring in depression. Physical pain is the easiest of all forms of pain because it hurts you from the outside and there are many means to heal it. The most painful one is emotional. Emotional pain kills from the in,side, slowly, like a poison. It destroys you because emotional pain always comes with mental. There is no way mental would never follow emotions.

I have felt them both for years. The feeling of emptiness and my life and soul being s-cked out of me every single moment. The constant mental stress and the ache in my chest that never seems to go away. And just when I saw a ray of hope shining down on me, darkness rose up to blanket my sunshine.

I feared this would happen the moment she let me k-ss her. I knew her more than she knew herself so I knew Rylee and Phineas were helping her to torment me. I was ready to take it as the final punishment for my mistakes because I knew after it, she would finally forgive and give me a chance but that didn’t mean I had no right to worry. There was every chance of her falling in love with her fake boyfriend and I feared who they would bring for her. I knew they knew there are only three men that would set me off when it comes to her, one who I feared had the ultimate ability to win her heart over completely and that would be my doom.

Ever since she returned, I felt my life return to my body and my soul was nearly at peace. I couldn’t lose that peace and hope, not to any other man. I knew she knew we both couldn’t live without each other or at least I hoped she knew that. I just hoped that the heart that have loved me for over a decade would keep on loving me.

“Daddy,” I jerked up from my chair and looked at the door. My two daughters stood there with a face filled with concern. Serenity ran over to me and placed her teddy on my thighs. “Why do you cry, daddy?”

“I’m not crying. I’m a big man and big men don’t…” I stopped when she reached for my face and swipe off a drop of tear with her thumb. She showed me the tear and frowned. “Oh, I didn’t know I was… I…I… it’s nothing, girls.”

“Dad, is this about mom going out on a date with another man?” Sera asked as she walked over to us. “Yeah, I know, dad, Zachary and I aren’t stupid.”

“What am I going to do?” I asked shakily, “what if she falls in love with him? What am I going to…”

“Dad,” her small palms cupped my cheeks the way they could and forced my l-ips to pucker, “it would never happen. Give mom a little faith. Originally, we were going to do something about it but changed our minds when we found out she was going to do this. Dad, mom needs this to get over the past and move on…”

“I know, but…”

“No. No matter how much it hurts or anger you, no matter the jealousy or bitterness, daddy, take it all because you deserve it, but know that she will never leave you for anyone else. You might not deserve her, but she is yours and we would make sure of it. Don’t forget that your little spies always have a backup plan. You just do what you have to do while we do ours. Okay, dad?”

I chuckled. “It’s funny, I’m getting assurance from my kids instead of the other way round. And you are right, I don’t deserve her. Maybe I should…”

“No, daddy, don’t you ever say that. You have to remember that even if you don’t deserve her, she is meant to be yours. Have you forgotten the promise you made to me? You promised to save mom and the only way to save both mom and every single one here is by saving yourself by being with her. Now say it, daddy, say she is yours!”

“She is mine.” I repeated lowly. I had no idea how they would do it, but I knew they would do it. Having so much hope on my almost nine years old children, but there was nothing I could do. I had no hope either way. They were my best chance. And they are right, I don’t deserve her but she is mine.

💔

To be continued.

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