Thorn between episode 74

TITLE: TORN BETWEEN

WRITTEN BY OGECHI ALABI

URENNA’S NARRATION 11

I was shy and I never considered myself with Paschal. I liked him because of his work ethic, but I never envisaged a romantic encounter. I had to look for how to avoid being alone with him. What if he had other girls he was sleeping with? I had never heard anything about him (I didn’t gossip). Since he was the one who suggested the relationship, I found myself thinking about it. I never thought I could be with a doctor, but I would not mind being with Dr Paschal. But I had to be sure he was for real. I didn’t want a repeat of Stanley’s experience and I had my first kiss with him. It was not intentional, and I believed it was fate it happened. Interestingly I enjoyed the kiss and I looked forward to it happening again. First, I had to be sure he was not playing games with our colleagues.

I was on duty with Monique (different departments) and was so glad to see her. We had catching up to do, and even though I wanted to keep my issue with Stanley away from prying eyes, I owed her the information. If not for her, I would never have known. And, she mixed well and knew who was who.

I gisted her what happened with Stanley and she had a good laugh. She said Peace called her nasty names and stopped talking to her. Peace thought with me out of the way Stanley would be serious with her, but he dumped her instead and was trying to make peace with me. I enjoyed Monique’s company. When she shared her stories they never felt like gossip.

I asked her if she knew those dating each other in the hospital, and she laughed. “Who do you want to know about?” She asked me.

“Dr Paschal.”

“He had eyes for only one babe, but the babe doesn’t notice him.”

“Really? Who is that?”

“Money.”

We both laughed at her joke. She had not heard anything, but she knew he had a serious relationship at the university. When the lady married someone else, it devastated him. Now, he was focused on building his career and making money. He works hard and takes overtime to make more money and he still does the job excellently.

Monique squirted her eyes and asked me, “Why are you asking? I have seen both of you together and there is chemistry. Everyone knows the guy has a soft spot for you. He did not hide it. Is something brewing?”

“Please, there is nothing. I consider him a mentor, and I want to be sure he is not one of those we hear their stories later.”

“Dr Paschal? Does he even have a penis? Do you know how many ladies here have tried him? He refused all advances. I heard that the beautiful Nurse from Akwa Ibom who all the doctors wanted to get into her pants, developed interest in him, but he didn’t look her way. She gave him all the signs short of rushing him, but he didn’t budge. When I heard what happened, I understood. He believes with money he can have the girl he wants and will keep her. Nurse Faith is a good lady and she genuinely liked him, but he proved hard to get.”

I smiled. I was scared I would learn of his antics, but now I knew I had met my man. For him not to fall for any of the nurses and doctors he worked with, then there was hope. Nurse Faith is beautiful and she was willing. Why did he choose me? I felt special. I was still worried about him wanting a secret relationship.

Paschal came to my unit that night. He spoke with his colleague and then said hello to us. He asked me how I was doing, and I almost blushed when I said I was fine. He dropped a note for me and left. I checked the note and he wrote his phone number and asked me to meet him in the office we were that morning by 11 pm.

I didn’t want to be alone with him in that room. I was scared we would kiss again and I didn’t want that. It was against my principles and I wanted to do things the right way and not jump the gun. I had to talk to myself about self-control and being able to say no when it came to that.

I met with Paschal after asking my colleague to call me if I was needed. He asked for my phone number and I gave him. He asked me how long I needed to end it with the two men still hovering around me. I said I would let him know when it was completely over.

I had to tell him my stance concerning relationships. “Dr Paschal, I date for marriage and not lust. I am intentional about spending quality time with someone who also wants the same thing. If you agree with my principle, then we can start, I am no longer with Stanley and will never be with him again.”

“What about the other guy? He likes you too. I saw both of you together.”

“He is a friend and nothing more. I enjoy his company but he is no different from Stanley. His interest in me is because of my principles but after he gets what he wants, what happens next?”

“True”

“I can’t have a secret relationship with you. It is either we are together or we are not. I don’t want to hide who I am with. I want to give the relationship a try. I never thought I would date a doctor and here we are. Also, note that I will continue to work as a doctor, and I will never quit to stay at home. My career is as important as yours.”

“I want children; who will take care of them?” He asked, smiling at me.

“Our parents will be our backbone. We will get someone from home who will help us look after them but every opportunity we have we will spend with them. We have to be hands-on parents.”

“We are planning a marriage when we don’t even know if we are compatible medically and otherwise. I am AS, what’s your genotype?”

“I am AA. O+.”

“It’s looking good already. I wanted a secret relationship first so others wouldn’t be involved in our business. I want us to get to know each other better before letting the whole world know. You are stepping down from what you are used to and you should adjust to it first before people discourage you. I like you a lot, more than you know and I don’t want to get disappointed. I was mocked once and I won’t be mocked again.”

I understood him. I was not stepping down, but rather I was stepping up. As a man, everything is about finance but it wasn’t for me. I was marrying late. My mother was worried, but my father supported my decision to finish everything academic before marriage. It was time to settle down. I wanted a relationship devoid of infidelity, physical and verbal abuse and trust issues. These were my top three concerns and I let him know.

“Stanley will not let you go easily. He is obsessed with you and would fight tooth and nail to have you. Be ready for harassment. If he finds out about us, it will get worse. Another reason we should be silent until he is a thing of the past,”

“He likes beautiful ladies. I can introduce him to the beautiful nurse in paediatrics, she will handle him well.”

“Faith? I don’t know if she likes money more than her self-respect.”

“She might make him sit up.”

“You heard about us?”

“Heard what?”

“We had something brief. I thought you heard that’s why you brought her up.”

“I didn’t.” I was worried. Paschal was truly one who could keep secrets. I wanted to know more, but I was also uncomfortable with the whole situation. My countenance had changed and he noticed.

“I’m a man. She caught me at the wrong time and we made out. It was nothing serious. I didn’t feel comfortable afterwards and I let her know it won’t happen again. And it didn’t. I respected her by not telling anyone about it but she told someone. She made obvious moves on me I refused to entertain. I am no saint, but I know where to draw the line. She came for me but I prefer to go after my desire. Take your time to think about my proposal and also get rid of the men who will hinder a smooth sailing relationship. The three things you mentioned you didn’t want in a relationship are the same things I do not want too. Integrity and fidelity are my watchwords. If you claim to have ended things with Stanley, I believe you. Do not make me distrust you. I will be open and honest with you, I expect the same. I had to tell you about Faith. I thought you had heard rumours and I also owed it to you.”

There was nothing more to say after that and the change in my countenance brought the meeting to an abrupt end. I went back to my duty post with so many questions yet unanswered.

Read – Making his cold heart soft episode 86

I was closest to Dumebi. Maybe because we lived in Lagos but also because she was level-headed and thinks things through. She wasn’t one to jump to conclusions. I wanted to tell her about Paschal so badly but I knew she liked Stanley. She didn’t like Collins at all, and a Paschal would be too much for her. I decided to let things be before I finished.

I didn’t see Paachal again or even speak with him until I was leaving. He came to my room at the lodge. I was shocked when I saw him, and I let him in.

“Congratulations. What’s next for you?” He asked.

“I need a break for two months before I serve.”

“Where do you intend to serve?”

“I don’t know yet. Maybe a private hospital that doesn’t have these working hours. I need a break”

“I would rather you worked in a Federal Medical Centre. You are good at what you do and you have compassion, that’s what the less privileged need.”

I looked at him as he made himself more comfortable on my bed. He wanted me to work for the government. I asked if he wanted anything to drink but he declined. I arranged the last batch of items while he watched me and we made small talk.

My sister’s driver picked up all my packed belongings and left for the car. I couldn’t believe a year was over already as I looked around the room.

“It feels surreal” he said and he came towards me, “I felt the same way.” He embraced me from behind and asked me, “Am I coming on too strong?”

“Not really.”

“Because I sense your withdrawal. Have you changed your mind? Or was it because of Faith? I wanted to talk to you on the phone but I was scared of your reaction. I don’t want to offend you. If you are no longer interested let me know.”

“You didn’t call or come to see me for almost three weeks. What was I supposed to do or think?” I asked but his breath was behind my ears and it came out as a whisper. I could not believe any man could have this effect on me.

“I should have. When I am vulnerable, I am taken for granted. I’m trying not to be vulnerable with you. I have tried to curtail my feelings, but I can’t anymore. Work your posting to Lagos and I will help get you a place to serve. I don’t have money, but I have connections in the medical field. I want to teach, I need you to know that. I’m not out to be wealthy but to be comfortable. I have responsibilities, I am the first child. I took a risk coming here, and I am glad you let me in. You don’t let men into your apartment as I was told. I will pursue you if you allow me, but if you have someone else or don’t want me anymore, tell me in good time.”

“Ok,” was all I could muster.

“You are so beautiful. I love your look so casually dressed.” He ran his hands down my legs. I felt electrified and pulled away. Did he know he had such an effect on women? “What’s the matter?” He asked.

“Nothing. We were too close; I wasn’t comfortable.”

“Are you scared of me?”

“Should I be?”

“No, but I can’t keep my hands off you. That’s why I kept away. I want to respect you. But I had to see you today before you left, I just had to.”

I smiled as he spoke. I realised both of us had a chemistry we couldn’t explain. But where was it all this while we worked together? I didn’t feel it then. Maybe because we were working and didn’t know each other intimately.

The driver knocked on the door again to signify he was ready. I am sure he was wondering what was keeping me. I looked at Paschal and told him I had to leave. I was to travel to Port Harcourt in three days.

“Can I call you or do you need more time?” He asked

“Call me if you want to.”

“Can I hug you? I will miss you. When will you be back in Lagos?”

“I will stay three weeks with my folks and then go to the US for a month. Will be back in Lagos to serve. That’s my plan.”

“That’s a long time. Won’t someone else snatch you from me before you get back?”

“It all depends on if you are committing or not.”

“I’m committing. I don’t want to lose you to anyone.” He pulled me into his arms and hugged me tight so that I could feel his heart beating so fast. Was it how love felt? It was very different from what I am used to. This time he kissed my lips directly without it being a mistake. I should have stopped it but I couldn’t resist. I kissed him back and it felt amazing. It was against my principles, but in my heart, he was already mine.

He separated himself from me and said “I could do this all day and night. But, we need to do more than this, I love it when we have serious discussions. I feel you are more of a partner than a lover. I want us to talk and plan more rather than meet so these two months will go a long way to building us.”

He was right. When we were alone our bodies were overshadowed by sexual attraction, but apart we could talk and work on a plan together. I was excited already. We left the lodge together after one last kiss at the door. He saw me to the car and then I left. My heart sank as I left him.

Tbc